It’s be-ribboned wedding cake charms, the only tool necessary for a good old fashioned cake charm pull! The practice of pulling tiny silver charms out of cake apparently began as one of those old Victorian wedding traditions that is alternately described as a lighthearted game and a ritual that would literally predict who would become an old maid. The cake charm you pulled from within or underneath the wedding cake might predict any of the following or any number of other good and not-so-good fortunes, for example:

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Here’s a little something from Slate’s DoubleX that talks about engagement rings – specifically what is to be done with them in the event that the wedding is called off.

Christopher Reinhold of Staten Island says the diamond ring he gave to Collette DiPierro, who broke off their engagement in September 2009 after four months and growing doubts, is rightfully his. He has sued her to get it back. In his New York state-court suit, Reinhold says that he gave DiPierro the ring upon her promise to marry him. Since she broke off the engagement and the marriage did not take place, the deal, he says, is off. But DiPierro says that because Reinhold proposed on her birthday, the $17,500 ring was a gift, not a token symbolizing a promise to marry. So she can keep it. Or, actually, spend it: Neither Reinhold nor DiPierro claims sentimental attachment; both would be happy with the ring’s cash value.

I know that an engagement ring ought to be a gift, not a contract or a payment in advance of future “services,” but in court contract law usually wins out and apparently agreeing to marry someone means entering into a verbal contract of which the ring is a part. Tres unromantic! Etiquette, of course, agrees that giving it back is the thing to do, but bad blood sometimes wins out over good manners.

What I’ve always wondered about the never-bride who keeps the ring is what she is going to do with it. Wear it? That could be awkward. Keep it at the bottom of her jewelry box? Again, awkward – I don’t like having old jewelry given to me by exes around. Sell it? Maybe I’m alone in thinking this, but that seems rather mean spirited – though if the giver of the ring was very abusive I might just say hock the thing for plane tix to somewhere awesome.

Calling off a wedding is such an emotionally charged thing to do, so do you really want a piece of bling (or the cash equivalent) reminding you that you or your once spouse-to-be said “I don’t” before anyone had a chance to say “I do”?

I HATE the idea that it’s even an issue. What does it matter if the ring was a gift or a way to seal the deal or something else? My idea of good manners does not include trying to profit off of a failed relationship (unless, as I mentioned above, there are some serious issues involved). Now you tell me: Is there any situation you can think of in which keeping the ring would be a love, not a hate?

The awesome Ann wrote with this simple request:

How can I find a ring bearer pillow that has a matching neck tie for the ring bearer?

Oh, you’d think it would be so easy, wouldn’t you. What could be cuter than a sweet petit ring bearer with a little ring pillow that coordinates perfectly with his itty-bitty necktie? Unfortunately, it seems that most people are more concerned with matching the ring pillow and the flower girl basket or the bride’s wedding dress or some other accessory associated with the ceremony. Ah, well… all that means is that your options aren’t as limitless as they are in most areas of wedding planning.

Luckily, Tonia Allen of Me and Matilda is out there filling the gap where ring pillows with matching ties are concerned! She creates unique, well-made, and affordable accessories for ladies and gents using durable, washable cotton (along with silk, satin, linen, microfiber, and more) in awesome prints, and her specialties include matching sets for ring bearers! Allen will even work with fabric of your choosing to make a custom set, but here’s a sampling of what’s currently for sale:

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One hopes that by now we all know that thank you cards are never optional and should really be sent out sooner rather than later. While it might seem like a hassle, sending out thank you cards – for wedding gifts that arrive before, during, or after the big day – in a timely fashion is as much about making things easy on the happy couple as it is about not cheesing off etiquette-obsessed relatives and friends.

How’s that? Consider that it is a lot easier to write a heartfelt thank you when the emotions you felt upon receiving a gift are fresh in your mind. A thank you card written in the post-wedding glow of excitement is almost always more gushy – guests like gushy – than one penned months later, which is likely to read kind of flat. As in “Thank you for the waffle iron. We will use it every time we want waffles and will think of you when we eat them.” *yawn*

I know, I know, writing thank you cards can be a boring job, and one too often shouldered entirely by the lady (though The Beard and I split them fairly evenly) and done all at once instead of in dribs and drabs as gifts roll in as they ought to be. So how can one pep up this dull yet necessary task? First, pop in a movie… as long as you’re not so easily distracted that you’re likely to jotting down the actors’ lines instead of your own thoughts.

And second, choose a thank you card that makes you want to send it just so everyone can see how awesome your thank you cards are! The gorgeous Mommy Holly, for example, makes colorful thank you cards that even I, queen of paper pitching, would keep!

Aren’t these thank you cards just super cute? They might almost make writing out 100+ thank you cards fun. Almost.

That’s it, Bon Moment! is my new favorite source for non-traditional wedding stationery! So what if I have a new fave every week – let’s call it my current favorite. And of all Bon Moment!’s amazingly adorable wedding stationery suites, their Classy Mustache package has to be the sweetest! Multiple mustache styles grace these invitations, save-the-dates, RSVP cards, menus, and wedding programs, in your choice of colors (though I like the green).

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Working the bridal reality show beat, you’ll notice that there are very few that I recommend as helpful, or even particularly entertaining. That’s because I find that most bridal reality shows are a) unrealistic, b) determined to reinforce negative stereotypes of the process, c) shaming to couples with tight budgets, and d) big on the generic over the imaginative.

Sure, there are exceptions. Sometimes there’s an episode of Rich Bride, Poor Bride that has someone with their head on straight, and I do find Don’t Tell the Bride both endearing and fairly rational. Up to now, that’s been the list.

Well, I’ve finally found another one I think has some real value to real-life brides planning their own weddings. Oddly enough, it’s a reality contest show. Seriously? It is. It’s called Four Weddings, it’s on TLC, and it still takes a tidge of digging to get to the good stuff, but it’s in there.
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It used to be easy to know what – more or less – a bride and groom would wear at a formal wedding. The bride would wear a white or ivory gown and a veil. The groom would wear the rented formalwear appropriate to the time of day and level of formality.

For a daytime ceremony, one wore a morning suit:

After five pm, a tuxedo was the way to go:

And for ultra-formal, there was always white tie and tails:

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How sweet are these bridal hair accessories from Oh My Deer? I’m not suggesting that a huge chiffon peony is for everyone, or that most brides’ first choice of ensemble topper ought to be a headband. But maybe we can all appreciate tiny veils? Big blooms? Lace flowers, feathers, and adorable bows? You know, from an aesthetic point of view. And maybe even if these bridal hair accessories aren’t for you, they’re helping you get out of the veil-or-nothing rut.

Pretty and fun! What more could you want? And I’m really tickled that at least one of Oh My Deer’s images feature a smiling model!