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A sporting way to choose surnames

By Never teh Bride

One struck out but both won

A New York-based couple who recently married in New Zealand found an innovative way to settle the usual surname dilemma. Society regulars Sam Shaffer and Kathryn Neale held a softball match wherein wedding guests stepped up to the plate to help determine which member of the couple would change their last name. According to Stuff New Zealand, it was the groom’s side that struck out, beaten 8-7.

Neale, 29, who grew up in the Wellington suburb of Newlands, said she liked her name and had had mixed feelings about changing it.

A baseball fan, Mr Neale (nee Shaffer), 34, originally suggested they play the American game – but his wife had insisted on softball.

“It was all a bit of a joke, I’ll take your name if you take my name,” said the bride, who met her husband in New York five years ago.

True to his word, Mr Neale will honour the deal “for a period of time”.

“We did think with Sam Neale you’d be able to get into more restaurants – if I could master the accent,” he said.

“(However) the world is not as progressive as we are. It’s an honorary title, but one with much honour.”








11 Responses to “A sporting way to choose surnames”




  1. mainegirl Says:

    I love this idea. My future step-daughter has simply combined the two last names–now we are the Brusselleans! I like the bride’s dress-I am in a bit of a gown dilemma. Lots of options and opinions.




  2. Never teh Bride Says:

    Combining two names can really enhance feelings of family, mainegirl. I love it!




  3. Derfel Says:

    Too bad you’ve already struck-out with your “man”, eh? Or did you ever really get to the plate with that boy?




  4. Never teh Bride Says:

    Not quite sure what you mean, Derfel. We have a wonderful relationship and partnership! Marriage, unfortunately, is not for everyone. The Beard is still deciding if it’s for him.




  5. Kate Says:

    What a sweet wedding picture! I love pictures that aren’t posed. Those two look genuinely happy. It’s cool that he was game to changing his name, if only “for a period of time.” My boyfriend who, in three years had never once spoke of marriage/longtime committment, brought up the name issue a few weeks ago when we saw something on TV about it. He said, “You’re taking my name when we get married, right?” I told him to propose first. It got me wondering if most guys are possessive about the name thing, something that never occurred to me before. I come from a family of all girls, so part of me would feel bad if I gave up my name because it’s not like I have a brother to keep it going. But another part of me is all junior high, wanting to scribble Mrs. Blah Blah Blah on my notebook.




  6. Derfel Says:

    Deciding if it’s for him? Oh please, do let us know how that works out in the next few years, okay?




  7. Never teh Bride Says:

    I sure will, Derf!




  8. gidget bananas Says:

    I lurve the dress that bride is wearing. Quelle chic!




  9. Never teh Bride Says:

    I’d be too afraid to wear it, though, gb. Empire waists and ample bosoms seldom work well together :-)




  10. Anonymous Says:

    I wouldn’t be so surprised that they both look extremely chic…Sam Shaffer is Anna Wintour’s stepson! Can’t think of a better motivation to be perfectly dressed.




  11. Dataceptionist Says:

    My friend got married recently and her husband didn’t respect his birth father enough to have his new wife take the name as his step father had always been kinder to him. So they settled on hypenated names of The Spencer-Prentices. Which is funny because her name’s at the front!




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