Something with sparkle

3 Diamond 1/4 ct (JKL / I2) Anniversary Band in 14k White Gold

Diamonds are not this girl’s best friend but I wouldn’t kick them out of bed, either. I’m not saying that I want a diamond engagement ring – because I actually want something in moissanite - but diamonds do remain something of a tradition. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that most young men looking to get hitched probably run on down to their local chain jewel and buy whatever the salesperson tells them to buy. This would be wonderful, as jewelers tend to know a lot about jewels, save for one thing: jewelry stores exist to sell jewelry. End of story.

As do diamond companies, which is why DeBeers likes to imply that diamonds are forever when in fact all diamonds are slowly transforming into graphite (which has a more stable chemical bond, blah blah blah) over time. Anyway. If your man is the more traditional sort and is going to propose with a diamond, like the quarter carat diamond trio above, he should have the tools to do it right.

So, for your perusal, here are some links to some of the more lengthy guides on buying diamonds. After you’ve e-mailed them to your fellow, don’t forget to let him know there will be a quiz in the morning.

The Diamond Buying Guide: This site has more pages than I probably have the patience to look through, but let’s just say it’s…comprehensive.

Diamond.com: This somewhat shorter guide includes some helpdul (and scientific) illustrations to help readers understand the importance of cut, etc.

The Guide at Bridaltips.com: The layout of this guide stinks and there are a lot of ads, but it does address concerns that the size of the ring has something to do with the size of the love. Which, of course, it doesn’t.

14 Responses to “Something with sparkle”

  1. Bria February 2, 2006 at 3:25 pm #

    “If tradition dictates that your man is going to buy you a diamond”–yikes, diamonds are some people’s legitimate preference. It’s cool for folks to have other tastes, but I think it’s a little much to imply that those who choose diamonds are doing it because they just can’t think of anything more interesting.

    Frankly, it comes across as sour grapes.

  2. Chaeriste February 2, 2006 at 3:29 pm #

    I love this site! I’m 80-some days away from my wedding and LOVE the tips and commentaries. My fianc did go traditional with diamonds. It is larger than I ever expected, but I do not measure his love for me by that. It could have been a chip and I wouldn’t have cared. Anyone who implies that the size of the ring is commensurate with the size of the love is a materialistic snot who deserves what they get – a loveless marriage and a lifetime of gazing at a ring that means nothing but money. My advice to future brides: GO SHOPPING WITH YOUR MAN FOR THE RING. Let him see what you like, what looks good on your hand, then set him loose. I happened to be with him when he bought my rings but it was exactly what we both wanted and the price was not to be beat. As for you, miss ‘never teh bride’, have you told The Beard that you want to marry? It’s your relationship, too. He is not the only one with control. Cheers!

  3. Never teh Bride February 2, 2006 at 4:08 pm #

    Oh, I didn’t mean it that way at all, Bria. I myself like diamonds in other things. I just meant to imply that a lot of people choose to buy diamonds because it’s tradition rather than stopping to consider the alternatives. I’ll think of a nicer way to phrase it.

  4. Never teh Bride February 2, 2006 at 4:18 pm #

    No, wait, that’s not it, either. While I think that a lot of people choose to buy diamonds because its tradition rather than stopping to consider the alternatives, I wasn’t even thinking about that when I wrote that sentence. *brainfart*

  5. Sheas February 2, 2006 at 6:14 pm #

    It’s true, though. I think a lot of people go for a diamond engagement ring without even really thinking about it because society (and DeBeers) implies that you’re only loved if you have a huge diamond ring.

    A guy is going to buy a diamond engagement ring because that’s what his girlfriend will most likely tell him to do, and he wants the best chances of her saying “yes”.

    Diamonds are mostly colorless and tend to bode well when worn every day (due to their ability to match almost anything and their hardness factor). But there are so many other options out there today, like Moissanite, which IMO looks 200% better than diamonds.

    So yes, people who choose diamonds for an engagement ring do tend to come off as uninspired to me. But then again, I’m not one fo find comfort within society’s constraints anyway. :)

  6. Twistie February 2, 2006 at 8:28 pm #

    I think sometimes it’s easy to overstate things in an effort to get others to think as far outside the box as we do, Bria. Yes, there are a lot of women who love diamonds not because they are traditional, but because they just like diamonds. OTOH, there are those of us who really don’t want them for reasons ranging from political, to pecuniary, to preference.

    All I know is that if my husband had presented me with a diamond ring, I would have worn it proudly because it came from him, but I would have been disappointed because I don’t like diamonds much. Luckily, though, he asked me what I wanted. That’s why my engagement ring is a sterling silver frog. If I take it off and you look inside, the underside of the frog is a man. IOW, he’s an enchanted prince.

    He goes wonderfully with the other large, silver animal-shaped rings I wear every day, he’s original, and he fits perfectly with my wedding ring. It was my mother’s, which is three interlocking rings of silver.

    So yes, I’d have accepted a diamond. But we saved a buttload of money, and I really love my ring. It makes me smile every single day, and has done since he gave it to me fifteen years ago. To my mind, there is no better proof that you’ve got the right ring!

    I think what NtB was saying was an excellent point: don’t let the industry or traditionalists tell you that you have to have a diamond. Make up your own mind. If you want diamonds, that’s great, but don’t forget all the other fantastic options out there simply because you’re worried about following all the rules.

    Choose diamonds because you like diamonds. If you don’t like diamonds, choose something else. Just remember that your engagement ring is a very personal choice, and you can choose what you really want, up to and including no ring at all.

  7. Kourtney February 3, 2006 at 11:16 am #

    And don’t forget: not all diamonds are the HUGE glaring white solitaires – I’m delighted with my wedding band (which I get to wear in 15 more days!), that we had custom made. I didn’t want an engagement ring. I had originally wanted to have sapphires & topazes, for their color. Our jeweler showed us an amazing array of colored diamonds (& I ain’t talkin’ J Lo’s big silly pink diamond), and I chose the colored diamonds, because a) the colors are amazing – deep warm browns, moss greens, soft gold, blues, blacks etc. & b) they’re a very hard wearing stone, especially in the setting I chose, so I can wear it every day, with no qualms. Which, if you choose pearls, opals, or other soft/brittle stones, can be a real concern. Our jeweler, who is a small, individual, custom goldsmith, was a very good source of ideas & information. So a jeweler, if chosen well, & not a not a big box store guy, can be wonderful & has far more interest in making sure that YOU are happy, & get what you want. Don’t overlook the custom jewelsmiths!

    (And he’s not paying me for this, but check this out – in the diamond example page, ALL the stones are diamonds, including the gorgeous brown ones with the celtic braided rope edge: http://www.jewelsbydesign.com/ )

  8. Never teh Bride February 3, 2006 at 1:43 pm #

    Those are so gorgeous, Kourtney! It’s so cool to see that diamonds aren’t just the bling we see on famous fingers. Should The Beard get on the ball, I am definitely going to hit up a custom jewelsmith because I want something a little different but still simple. Maybe something with a celtic look…

  9. La BellaDonna February 3, 2006 at 3:37 pm #

    NtB: if you take a quick google on “celtic rings with diamonds”, you should be able to find quite a few inspirational sites.

  10. Gail February 7, 2006 at 11:03 pm #

    My engagement ring ended up having a largish white sapphire, with two tiny blue sapphires to the side, in a really pretty flower setting. We found our jeweler at the renissance faire of all places, but I loved his gold settings. I had planned on going with a smaller blue sapphire, but I saw this ring with a large white sapphire, and I fell in love with the stone. I was shocked to find out that white sapphires, even large ones, cost next to nothing.

    So, I get all the flash with almost no guilt. :)

  11. Never teh Bride February 8, 2006 at 2:01 pm #

    That sounds gorgeous, Gail!

  12. Johanna February 8, 2006 at 5:48 pm #

    The most memorable engagement rings I’ve seen are the ones that aren’t traditional diamond solitaires–my great aunt had the most beautiful sapphire and platinum engagement ring. Given the political circumstances that surround the diamond trade, I applaud couples who look for alternatives.

  13. Mia April 27, 2006 at 11:21 am #

    we just got engaged and are definitely looking for alternatives. Not because of financial reasons but for political and humanitarian ones. We’ve looked at lab created diamonds, but don’t particularly like the colors- plus our choice seems limited in Canada. i have never heard of white saphires just like i never heard of moissanite….so thanks for the info!

  14. lassaad January 5, 2007 at 5:57 pm #

    The problem that people didn’t take time to learn about diamonds and they think that only jewelers are wight.
    they forget to take a diamond to appraisal , don’t verify the certificates, forget insurance,….