Dressing: For guests
By Never teh Bride
I’m pretty jazzed because my aunt is getting married in Florida this month and I’m actually going to be able to attend the wedding. Once flight information was worked out, it was time to start thinking about what I was going to wear. What I was going to carry. And, of course, what I was going to wear on my feet. I’m thinking of wearing a dress I wore when acting as a friend’s maid of honor a few years back. The dress looks very much like the one pictures in this post. Except the dress has skinny straps instead of a halter and is more purple than red.
Anyhow, before I chose a dress, I called my stepmom to inquire as to what time the ceremony was being held and the general level of formality. The answer: Formal to semi-formal. Then I asked about my aunt’s wedding colors. It wouldn’t do to show up in a dress that was too close in color to the wedding party. The answer: Red and yellow. So I’m safe.
Not many people think about proper wedding guest attire. It used to be that the invitation would give some clues as to the nature of the wedding. Nowadays, not so much. As for the wedding I’m attending, I was invited by phone. Tsk tsk. Anyway, About.com has some wonderful guidelines for wedding guests who want to look their best. Here are some highlights:
Start off with the invitation. Is it in flowing engraved black script on a heavy cream paper with formal language? Odds are the wedding will be similarly formal. Does it cheekily ask you to come see them get hitched? Wedding guests should look for a nice casual outfit. And of course, it may tell you directly on the invitation - black tie, casual attire etc.
Don’t wear:
White. (This rule has relaxed some, and you can get away with wearing a printed dress with a white background and some cream colored clothing. Just be careful not to upstage the bride.)
Black to a daytime wedding
Jeans - duh
Anything too sexy or revealing
Anything torn, with holes, stained, too big or too small for you!
Anything sleeveless or strapless to a religious wedding. Bring a wrap to cover your shoulders.Wedding guest style for her:
Informal Daytime: Short dress or suit (business attire OK for morning weddings)
Informal Evening: Cocktail dress
Semi-Formal Daytime: Short dress or suit
Semi-formal Evening: Cocktail dress
Formal Daytime: Short dress or suit. Hats and gloves optional.
Formal Evening or Black-Tie: Long or dressy short cocktail (beading, glam accessories, wrap)
Ultra-formal or White Tie: Long gown, extra glitz (furs, diamonds, etc.)
I’d add that one should consider the predicted indoor and outdoor temperature, because I’ve frozen my butt off at plenty of weddings. And how long you can really last in those heels. And what sort of people the bride and groom are. Some families won’t mind you showing a little skin. Others will look at an exposed ankle and gasp in horror. My dress is sleeveless, so I may want to invest in a nice wrap for the occassion. Oh, and I’m going to wear sassy heeled boots…because I like to create a stir.








February 8th, 2006 at 6:41 pm
The dress sounds great, NtB! And I’m a firm believer in kick-ass boots.
Dressing appropriately as a guest can be almost as much fun as dressing appropriately as the bride.
Have fun at the wedding, and be sure to dish for your loyal readers!
February 9th, 2006 at 4:43 am
What about the ‘garden wedding’? A recent event saw the bride barefoot and the groom and his men in thongs/flipflops. I weet with the floaty dress, heels and large hat (we have the hole in the ozone and all to think about down under!) and I felt a tad overdressed! In a stylish and fabulous way of course!
February 9th, 2006 at 11:12 am
Well, lizabeth, I’m of the firm opinion that it’s better to be fabulously overdressed than underdressed
February 9th, 2006 at 2:28 pm
I’m of the firm opinion that it’s better to be fabulously overdressed than underdressed
Yes yes, its better for people to talk about how you looked far too stunning in a delightful Italian dress opposed to looking far too tacky with your scragly jeans with thong showing and sandals.
February 11th, 2006 at 1:42 am
Ooh, don’t you love having an excuse to dress up and/or buy something new?! Wahoo! We have a family wedding in May and I’m already drooling over catalogs & pattern books. You’d think I was the bride, for Pete’s sake!
February 11th, 2006 at 1:44 am
(By the way: I love your [proposed] outfit! The boots are genius.)
February 12th, 2006 at 2:52 pm
Thanks, Jenny!