Manolo for the Brides

The other day, reader Kourtney asked about preserving her fabulous silk wedding dress. Reader La BellaDonna quickly offered some wonderful and furthermore practical advice (don’t I have the most fantastic readership ever?) which included a link to a list of companies that supply acid free paper. I thought everyone should have a chance to read her advice, particularly because silk can be a rather temperamental fabric.

Now, there are a boatload of preservation kits out there, of the “do it yourself” variety and the “have someone else do it for you” variety. I think I’d prefer the latter. But how to find a competent pro to handle what is likely the most important and meaningful garment you’ll ever own?

The easiest way to find a company that will treat your dress right is to ask your seamstress or just a seamstress. Or contact the International Fabricare Institute. They know what they’re talking about. Consider making arrangements before the wedding, so you can get your gown cleaned and on its way to being preserved lickety-split. Even if you’re using a home preservation kit, however,

Waiting until after the honeymoon to take protective precautions for your wedding gown is waiting too long, according to 1800bride2b. Stains that you may not even see, such as from perspiration, will immediately begin to take their toll on the delicate fabric. Ideally, you should make arrangements to have your gown professionally dry cleaned as soon as possible after your wedding day. Have the gown taken to a reputable cleaner who will also inspect zippers and buttons that may need to be repaired or tightened. You should make a special note for the cleaners about any spots or stains, particularly on the train, that may need special attention.

What then? Do you fold or hang? As La BellaDonna notes, hanging puts pressure on the gown and can loosen or even tear fabric over time. Folded gowns should be refolded along different lines a few times a year to prevent tears due to stresses in the fabric. Acid free tissues and boxes are a MUST because all wood and forms of wood pulp secrete acids that can stain and damage fabrics. Plastics are also a no-no.

Your wedding gown needs air to circulate through the fibers or it will eventually start to rot. For this reason, you should not wrap your gown in plastic for a long period of time. Also, some plastics produce textile-destroying hydrochloric acid when in contact with moisture for long periods of time.

Once you’ve lovingly and carefully packaged your gown (or had someone else do it for you), it should be stored somewhere it won’t be exposed to extreme shifts in temperature or humidity. That means no basements, no hot and dry attics, and no laundry rooms. Too much moisture in the air can cause mold and mildew to grow in places they are not welcome - i.e. on your gown. Light can cause the fabric of your gown to become discolored and even disintegrate!

If you truly want to preserve your dress for decades and decades, take all the precautions you can. I have experiences the pain of improper dress storage first hand. I once had a beautiful baby blue ballgown that developed inexplicable baby pink spots and little holes because of my carelessness. Don’t let this happen to you.

Think choosing a wedding gown is one of the easier parts of planning a wedding? Think again. I found a checklist that makes shopping for the perfect gown into a multi-step, rocket science-like affair. If you have lots of time, it says, you should hit every salon, shop ’til you drop, and agonize over your gown decision. Yet you should still be decisive!

If you’re destined for the alter, nine to twelve months before the big day, you should:

Start envisioning yourself in your wedding gown. Think about your everyday style. Now write down six adjectives that best describe how you want to look and feel (summery, sweet, elegant, royal, sexy, sophisticated, demure, over-the-top, to name a few).

Now get some paper and a pencil (again) and put into words what you absolutely do not want in a gown (for example, short sleeves, a full skirt, or beading).

Eight months before the wedding, you should:

Get your gear ready. Many salons provide some of the essentials listed below, but they may not fit properly: A strapless bra or bustier Control-top panty hose (gowns go on more smoothly, especially the often-too-small sample sizes) A slip if you plan to try on sheaths or slip dresses Shoes with approximately the same heel height you plan to wear on your wedding day Tissues for when your mom sees you in your first gown (this is good advice)

Seven months before, you should:

Narrow down your gown choices and go for a second (or third or fourth!) salon visit. You can return as many times as you like. No matter how indecisive you think you are, you probably won’t come close to being the most neurotic bride they’ve ever helped (are you sure??). Also, make at least one trip on your own (so you can ponder your options without others’ opinions coloring your thoughts).

At the six month mark, you ought to:

Order your gown. And make sure the following contract points are in writing on your receipt: designer name style number or name size or measurements the salon is sending to the manufacturer approximate delivery date how many fittings are included in the price (if any) how much money you still owe for the gown amount of your deposit and that it’s marked paid

When the five month mark rolls around, you should:

Lose weight before your fittings begin. Once fittings are underway, try to maintain your weight. (Better yet, forget about the diet — obviously he thinks you look great just the way you are.) (Yeah!)

Six weeks before the wedding, you should:

Have your first fitting. Invite an honest, sharp-eyed friend or family member to come along. Bring your accessories, too, so you can see the whole look. And then continue to schedule fittings until you are completely satisfied.

Then, at your leisure:

Bring your maid of honor to your final fitting to learn about the gown. Does it need bustling? Ask the salesperson to teach her how to do it. Does it have complicated straps or buttons? Make sure she knows how to work them. Also, find out how to banish last-minute wrinkles. Should you use an iron? On what setting? Is steaming a better option? And what if you spill something on the gown? Are there certain products you should or shouldn’t use? (Don’t be scared, be prepared!)

Even though all these steps are about making brides look their best, the whole thing sounds like a huge hassle involving driving around town over and over again. Um, much like many of the other aspects of wedding planning

So, if having to make oodles and oodles of decisions regarding the wedding and the reception is driving you batty, I invite you to take a look at this link, which may help you remember the beauty of having the freedom to choose.

As I’m usually apt to feature wedding gowns that are fairly reasonably priced (or at least of average price, insofar as anything proceeded by the word ‘wedding’ can be average), I thought I’d show you something nice and a bit more expensive. I looked at EBAY and some of the designer web sites, but while high-price gowns are easy to find, high-price gowns that are in some way distinctive are apparently in short supply. How many variations on strapless, princessy gowns can there possibly be? Answer: A lot.

So instead, here we have a Carmen Marc Valvo piece valued at $3,480 that looks rather like a nightgown. This ivory accordion-pleated style polyester gown features silver beading and sequins on a (very) sheer V neckline that looks like it is in danger of slipping below the model’s “vital zones.” For this reason, I doubt this empire-waist gown would work on a bustier bride.

Though the gown itself is quite pretty, I am tempted to ask the model if she’s forgotten to put on her overgown.

Last week I received a postcard in the mail from my friends Will and Leah. It was a save-the-date card announcing the details of their upcoming nuptials. While it is not unusual to receive such a card, it was slightly less than usual in this case because:

1. The postcard (which featured a lovely picture of the couple) was not a follow up to a traditional paper invitation but in lieu of one, and

2. The postcard served as a mechanism to point its recipients (The Beard and I) toward Will and Leah’s wedding web site.

Now I imagine that Will and Leah did send traditional invitations to their families and less tech-savvy friends. But for a soon-to-be wed couple that has a lot of friends scattered about the country and wants to give their prospective guests as much information as possible, attractive postcards that point to a web site can be a fabulous and fiscally sensible idea.

I like a good web site (especially when it’s about weddings) and Will and Leah’s site has a nice layout and is rich in detail. Of course, it helps that Leah is no stranger to creating web sites. If, however, you are like me and most comfortable typing into prefabricated textboxes, there are a number of services (both free and not so free) that will aid you in the creation of a wedding web site.

Wed Quarters: This service offers a variety of colorful templates and costs $25 for a year of hosting. Users can craft an unlimited number of custom pages but I’m not sure how much space they provide for images.

My Event: Users pay roughly $10 per month for a web site with images, music, video, and flash. Visitors can RSVP for the wedding right on the site.

The Knot: The Knot has 40 very simple templates, and allows users to send electronic save-the-date cards and guest updates. It is free for site members.

Wedding Window: This service is $79 for 12 months and seems to provide elegant results. See Star Jones’ wedding site.

Brides and grooms that are less interested in using their site as a vehicle for information and simply want to document the process can always use a free blogging service like Blogger to satisfy their craving for high-tech hitchin’.

The computer cake topper above is by Joshua’s Clay Creations.

I, for one, welcome our new alien overlord and his zombie bride!