Archive for June, 2006

Beyond cakes and caterers

Thursday, June 22nd, 2006

Ever looked at Beliefnet? I’m not particularly religious but I do like to browse the site to check out what is happened in the world of some of the more eclectic religions (like Jainism and Zoroastrianism). I was browsing around this morning and found a non-specific guide to preparing one’s spirit for marriage. It’s rather like your other wedding prep timelines except it’s all about THE SOUL ::cue Twilight Zone type music here::

At nine months to one year before the wedding, you should:

Refresh your memory about your faith tradition’s teachings on marriage and wedding preparation. Meet with a pastor, rabbi, or spiritual leader, or simply read up to reconnect with the spiritual meaning of a marital union.

Five to eight months before the wedding, you ought to:

Rediscover family. A wedding is about more than just the bride and the groom, it’s about the two families that are coming together through the marriage. (Awwwww)

Two to four months prior, you should:

Write a letter to your fiancé. You don’t have to include in it every hope, dream, and expectation for your marriage—just share your thoughts about what you are feeling as the wedding draws closer.

And one month before you’re set to tie the know, you might want to:

Take a long, quiet walk with your future spouse.

I like these suggestions. They are straightforward. No mumbo-jumbo here. In fact, plenty of the pre-wedding suggestions they give in the article can be applied to one’s everyday life with positive results. Take a walk with The Beard? Sure! Reconsider what faith means to me? Can do! Think about family? You got it!


Heads up, future brides: If you happen to be about a size six and are in the market for an inexpensive gown, you may want to consider Sew Bridal’s gown sample sale. The lovely Style Graduate pointed out that Sew Bridal has a selection of gowns (none more than $300) that are the actual designer samples shown in McCall’s photography. The selection will change periodically, so it’s worth it to check back now and again.

A groom’s cake for gamers

Wednesday, June 21st, 2006

The tradition of having a second wedding cake, which can be presented at either at the rehearsal or the reception, has its roots in the southern United States. The groom’s cake, as this cake is known, is typically smaller than the main wedding cake and is often quirky–remember the bleeding armadillo cake from Steel Magnolias? In the past, the groom’s cake was quickly cut and boxed during the wedding reception. Every unmarried woman was given a slice to take home and put under their pillows (um, ew). The man she dreamed about that night would become her husband.

Today’s groom’s cake is typically a reflection of the groom’s interests. A quick Google search for “groom’s cake” reveals images of small (and often brown) cakes shaped like dogs, golf clubs, computers, fish, cowboy hats, and more. A regular poster on the Cheap Ass Gamer message boards was happily surprised to receive a groom’s cake shaped like an XBOX.

Play it don\'t spray it, yo

I think that is pretty cool, but I’m biased considering I once made a very similar Sega DreamCast cake for The Beard. I am now considering creating a bleeding armadillo cake, just for the heck of it. If you, too, want to serve a slice of armadillo butt to your beau (just like Ouiser Boudreaux!), a recipe can be found here.

The highly embellished bride

Tuesday, June 20th, 2006

With the exception of the fact that every gown offered is either strapless or cut down to here, Eve of Milady is alright in my book. But that’s the Eve of Milady of today. I like to look on consignment sites to see what sort of gowns former brides have put on the market. May I present, the Eve of Milady of yesteryear:

Should he marry her or roast her over a campfire?

Have a closer look:

Now that\'s embellishment!

Eve of Milady gowns tend to be highly embellished, but I see that they have actually toned their style down in the past few (say, tennish?) years. I’m pretty glad that the huge lace roses and oodles of distracting sparkles that once graced the most fashionable nuptial garments have fallen out of favor. I can remember stuffing myself into dresses like that for school dances and feeling like a pig on a platter. I.e. As spruced up as all-get-out but tremendously unhappy about it.

For those with tastes that differ from my own, this gown can be had for a mere $100.

Bottlenose’s bride a widow

Monday, June 19th, 2006

A marriage that ended too soon

The wacky British millionaire who made headlines after she married a dolphin in 2005 is now a widow. In December, Sharon Tendler, 41, tied the knot with a male Tursiops truncatus known as Cindy, 35, after a fifteen year long friendship. Sadly, Cindy passed away on June 18

…and like all creatures of the deep was given a burial at sea.

“Cindy swam slowly and he had problems eating. Sometimes he didn’t eat at all. He vomited and did not look good,” Maya Zilber, manager at the Eilat reef’s training center told ‘Ynetnews’.

Reef workers put Cindy’s body in a boat and sailed into the sea where they parted from it.

I, for one, hope that Tendler recovers and one day will be strong enough to search for another aquatic husband (because, hey, that’s entertainment!). Should she find a new true love, she may want to consider this cake topper from Island Wedding Shop:

Together they are faster than lightning!

Guests get squeezed

Saturday, June 17th, 2006

According to a recent story in the New York Times, wedding guests are feeling the squeeze when it comes to nuptial gift giving.

The ceremony and attendant fetes have become an artfully disguised quid pro quo, with the couple hoping for gifts that will match what they have spent on their nuptials — and stressed-out guests who feel they have no choice but to give in to the pressure or be branded cheap or uncaring.

“We have to stop the madness,” Mr. Farley [a senior editor at Town & Country and author of “Modern Manners: The Thinking Person’s Guide to Social Graces“] said. “According to the nitty-gritty rules of social etiquette, guests are not obligated to bring anything to a wedding.”

Peggy Post, author of “Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette, 5th Edition” (Collins, 2005), outright debunked “the old myth” about giving a wedding gift that is the equivalent of what the couple spent on you for the reception. “It’s about how well you know the couple and their families — and what you can afford,” she said.

THIS is especially true, both experts say, when it comes to deciding what your budget will bear when you are invited to a destination wedding, if you are a member of the wedding party or when multiple showers are involved. “Showers have gotten so huge,” Ms. Post said. “When you get into multiple showers, that’s where you can cut back on the gifts.”

Remember guys and gals, the old ‘cover the cost of the plate’ adage is a myth. Never, ever, ever feel obligated to break the bank when you’re buying wedding gifts.

Nice slip, but where’s your gown?

Friday, June 16th, 2006

Hey! You forgot your dress!

I’m all for simple. But I draw the line at wedding dresses that look too much like underwear. It is possible for a dress to be too plain. Were I to witness a bride walking down the aisle in this specimen of wedding wear from the typically more elaborate Allure Bridals, my first thought would be, “What happened to your gown that forced you to get married in your slip, hon?”

Notice the molded cups...

If you need more convincing, note that it appears the top has molded cups rather like these:

The similarities are striking!

The similarities are truly striking!

And P.S. what is up with the look on Ms. ModelBride’s face? All these wedding wear models need to go back to Barbizon or wherever it is they came from.

Ideas today, hair tomorrow

Thursday, June 15th, 2006

Don\'t want none unless you\'ve got a bun, hon.

What’s the best way for brides-to-be to find ideas? By exploring their options, of course. The always lovely Dataceptionist has requested that I find ya’ll some good sites to peruse wedding hairstyles. Now I know there are some informative hairstyle how-to’s out there, but frankly there are also a lot of people out there (like me) who can’t even manage to braid someone’s hair. I’m of the opinion that unless a bride has long, flowing gorgeous hair that simply dazzles when unstyled, the doing of hair is best left to the pros.

But brides can still walk into the salon armed with a picture of what they want. And while it’s important to be realistic, I’m convinced that good stylists are magicians in disguise. To illustrate, long ago, when prom time came around, my hair was long on top but shaved near to bald underneath – hey, it was the 90s, cut me some slack. My mom’s stylist gave me an updo that made it look like I had a full head of hair. Furthermore, he crafted a six-petaled flower on my head…out of hair. It was amazing.

Anyway, to find examples of the hottest in wedding hair, I first did a Google image search for wedding hairstyles. That netted me 3,360 of bridal heads of all descriptions. Change that to wedding hair or bridal hair and the image count goes up to 26,700. While not all of the images are inspirational and some are just plain silly (dogs in tiaras?!), there are a wide range of bridal styles displayed in the results.

A site called simply Beautiful Hairstyles includes a wedding style gallery divided into categories such as updos and retro hairdos. While the site itself is sort of goofy, the images were for the most part culled from actual weddings. So you can see how certain hair styles look on real people rather than models.

Hairfinder, the “International Hair Directory” (whatever that means), allows you to upload a photo of yourself and virtually try on different wedding styles. There is a free demo, but in order to access Hairfinder’s database of 3,500 hairstyles, you need to pay a small fee.

There is, of course, always WeddingHair, which sells styling kits for do-it-yourselfers. If you are a bride who has absolutely no idea how she wants her hair done on her wedding day, this can be a good starting off point since the dos tend to be fairly basic. And if you want a laugh, have a look at the teen hair category – those sure don’t look like any teens I know!

While there is software such as The Perfect Wedding Series: The Beautiful Bride – HAIR out there, in the end, I say Google it. There are too many sites with three grainy pics calling themselves wedding hair resources. You may as well go right to a giant image bank that’s going to grant you the variety you need to come up with a hairstyle that meets your demands.

By the way, the fabulous Kristin sent me a link to an article that proves that spontaneity doesn’t always equal romance. Yesterday, a stark naked would-be groom jumped out of his apartment window in an effort to convince his girlfriend that taking risks (risks like getting married) is an important part of life. He ended up running from a vigilante gunman! I smell a metaphor in there somewhere…