Matrimonial miscellany

I’m of two minds where wedding performances are concerned. As fun as they can be, some of the skits friends and family decide to put on are atrocious and leave everyone feeling just a little embarrassed. Today’s example, which to me via Julie, is one of the better wedding dance numbers I’ve seen. Compare their take on OK Go‘s A Million Ways to the original.

Think you can dance? Being a nearly lifelong dancer myself, I’d recommend you pick up a tome along the lines of Dance Composition Basics: Capturing the Choreographer’s Craft. Your wedding reception choreography will be original and rock the socks of all who witness it.

In other news, good luck walking down the aisle with daddy if you’re dreaming of tying the knot in a Lutheran Church in Stockholm.

Some pastors are refusing to allow the practice they say is sexist, a pastor said on Friday.

“In Sweden we have worked hard in many different ways to eliminate everything that is unequal,” a Lutheran Church vicar in the Stockholm region, Yvonne Hallin, told AFP.

She said she would not allow the custom in her parish, and noted that Stockholm’s bishop issued a recommendation in 2003 that pastors discourage it.

Sure, many people find the custom sexist or even icky, but I don’t necessarily see that as a reason to ban it altogether. Those who feel it’s offensive likely won’t incorporate it into their wedding ceremonies. Those who still think it’s sweet should march proudly down the aisle arm in arm, if their particular faith allows for that sort of thing.

It should be noted, however, that dad walking the bride down the aisle is primarily an anglo-saxon tradition and was apparently not part of the Swedish wedding ceremony until it was popularized there by US television programs. The bishop’s 2003 recommendation was based on the notion that a church wedding service should be strictly religious and should not incorporate modern, secular practices like aisle walking.

7 Responses to “Matrimonial miscellany”

  1. Pencils says:

    I had both my parents walk me down the aisle, as is common in Jewish weddings, for both the bride and the groom. We did happen to have a Jewish wedding, as my husband requested, but I would have had both my parents escort me in whatever ceremony we chose. And I know my mom was touched when I asked her. I thought having both my parents do it turned a patriarchal tradition into something sweet, and something to honor my parents, who have done a lot for me.

  2. Never teh Bride says:

    I did the same thing, Pencils…and the last remnant of Judaism in my family died out many decades ago. My mother was just as much a factor in my development as my father — probably more so — and it felt wrong to exclude her. My dad was none to happy about it, though.

  3. Ninjarina says:

    I’d imagine that it is quite nice to have both parents HELP their daughter down the aisle. I have a feeling that when I make that trek that my legs will most likely turn to jelly and I will need my parents to literally and figuratively support me in those last steps.

  4. Annalucia says:

    All right, the Annalucia is a little slow-witted this morning, so someone must explain the joke to her. The dance video, it is a parody of what, exactly?

    That said, she thinks the gentlemen danced rather well, with more precision than she would have expected.

  5. Pencils says:

    Really, NTB, your dad wasn’t happy about it? Are your parents divorced? If my dad minded, he buried it well. The only thing he was not happy about was not getting to wear a tux! Poor Dad, he’s never had a reason to wear a tux. (My parents eloped.) But we had a semiformal morning wedding so it was suits. However, I have a subtle plan to throw my parents a black-tie 50th wedding anniversary party in five years, and my dad can wear as fancy a tux as he likes.

    If I really thought it bothered my dad, I would have talked to him about it, but he’s not like that. And my mom was just beaming while we went down the aisle. We’re not Jewish, so I’m sure my mom never thought she’d do such a thing. The photos of the three of us are wonderful, some of my favorites from the entire wedding.

    It just seems strange to me that there are “official” positions in the wedding ceremony for the bride’s sisters and brothers as bridesmaids, maids of honor, and groomsmen, her father is her escort, but her mother, quite commonly the most important person in her life other than her fiance, doesn’t have a definite role. Lots of couples have their moms walk down the aisle at the beginning of the ceremony, but there’s no official title or role there. Well, I think moms should escort too!

  6. Annalucia, the fellows in the vid copied a number done by some musical group I’d never previously heard of. I think they are known for clever, low budget videos?

    Pencils, they are divorced, but that’s not why it bothered him. He’s just a traditional dude with traditional ideas about how weddings involving daughters ought to be and his ideas did not involve my mother taking my other arm!

  7. Dianasaur says:

    My husband didn’t think he could dance, but I have been dancing with professional companies for 15 years and promised him I’d make him look good. I choreographed our first dance to “You won’t be lonely” by Stryper. We had such a good time, surprised everyone, and it ended up being our favorite part of our wedding. Now he wants to dance with me all the time! Woo-hoo!