You want to hear a pet peeve of mine? Well, here it is: Bosom cups that stand up of their own accord when empty. I’m totally feeling this Vivienne Westwood gown (worn by the vivacious Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie Bradshaw) from the midsection down, but looking at the uppermost part is making me want to scream, “Alter the cups! The cups!” Unflattering things happen when you don a dress you can’t fully fill out. Observe…
I don’t care how perky your personality is. It’s bra time, honey.
Whee! Thanks, NtB. Those cups were bugging the hell out of me.
And I might be in the minority on this, but I actually really, really like the feather hair adornment. Only Carrie Bradshaw would be able to pull that off, though.
You know what I don’t need to see? Sarah Jessica Parker’s droopy deflated boobs. Yes, that looks awful. It looks like she’s trying on the gown and they haven’t altered–or pressed–it yet. Also, she looks damn old in that gown, it just emphasizes her age and how unattractively ropy and skinny she is. Run away, Mr Big! Run away! You look like someone who enjoys food, find a nice woman who looks like she’s eaten carbs in the last decade.
And I wouldn’t mind the feather hair thing if she weren’t wearing a veil. They don’t go together. One or the other. I do like her bouquet, though. Looks like mine, just a bunch of gorgeous long-stemmed Vendela roses with a wide ribbon tied around. (Although I removed the leaves, it looks a little odd like that.)
I’m with you, Pencils. That gown makes SJP look as though she’s ancient, where a gown that doesn’t show off how her boobs have sagged over time could – ironically – actually make her look younger than her years. A good stylist would never have picked this gown for her to wear…although a bit of alteration would have made it far less dire.
As for the feathers, again, I have to agree with Pencils. The feathers are fine. The veil is perfectly respectable. They. Don’t. Go. Together. I’d have left the veil off. I think it’s contributing way too much to the mutton dressed as lamb air of the whole thing, where the feathers alone would look rather awesomely independant.
I think many men would prefer a woman who likes to eat. My boyfriend, who lives in Milwaukee, and I joke about the “Milwaukee roll.” It’s those little love handles and tummy that most of the women in Milwaukee have because they like to drink beer and eat bratwurst. “Men here don’t trust a woman who doesn’t have a Milwaukee roll,” he says. “They don’t want to be with someone who won’t eat and drink.”
I seriously hope this is some sort of dream sequence and not her actual wedding attire in the movie. She looks old, too pale, gaunt and a little Cruella Deville in that first picture.
However, I am going to give her credit for not getting a boob job.
Amen to that!
This is *way* too much dress for a tiny woman like SJP. It would look great on a taller, fuller-figured woman, but here? Both the bride and the dress look awful. I hope this is part of some “nightmare wedding” dream sequence, but knowing the show’s history of horrible fashion mistakes it’s probably not.
Wow. That dress is a disaster. It looks like something she just whipped together out of the motel’s drapes and sheets. It looks stiff and wrinkley at the same time — kinda like Grandpa after he died.
women over 35 look *ridiculous* in giant poofy ballgown wedding dresses no matter how well (or in this case ill) they fit. I would like to believe that Carrie would have gone for something chic and more appropriate, – a tea length something perhaps. I second the hoping it’s a dream sequence.
It is the illustration of the optimism of the Never teh Bride that she so generously refers to these cups as half anything. I’d say 1/8 is more like it.
I find it extremely entertaining that the rest of the ensemble looks worse than that ridiculous feather she’s wearing. Eat a cookie, SJP!
I can’t help but be horrified by both of these pictures. She looks horrendous in the first picture, and her boobs were not meant for that dress.
Good heavens, the cups on that dress are so much bigger than her actual chest. Isn’t there a seamstress on set? And someone with an iron?
A dress that covered more of her ropy upper torso and arms, and a lack of veil would have made her look a bit younger and classy. This makes her look old and like she’s trying too hard.
I tended bar & waited on tables, for more than ten years, at a country club that allowed non-members to rent out their ballroom for whatever. Office parties, frat parties, weddings…the owners weren’t proud. They’d take anybody’s money. And during those moments at your wedding when the bartender and service staff weren’t needed, we’d critique everything, but especially the clothing on the female half of the wedding party. We were bored…and brutal. And we would totally tear this bride a new one.
(The guys? Who cares about a bunch of guys in rented tuxes?)
I’m sorr…no, actually, I’m not. Nothing works. Not the feather, not the veil, not the bouquet, not the hair, not the gown…nothing. It’s a train wreck.
Wow, I actually thought this was a parody. She looks so drawn & severe. I love the skirt, but the top is a costume-y horror.
Like they cast a drag queen for a dream sequence.
And I never rag on celebrities. This is ragging on the movie costume dept. for making her looks like sheer bridal hell.
This dress is not made for the thin woman, not even if her skin is peach and ivory. If it is leathery, as it is with the SJP, it is most disastrously unfitting.
Far better for the lady to wear the dress with the bateau top and no sleeves. This will expose the slender arms and cover up the vast acreage of That Which Should Not Be Put On Display.
Aaaaiiieee. This dress would look delectable on, say, Kelly Osbourne. Or America Ferrera. On the erstwhile sprightly Ms. Parker, though, it mostly reminds me to pick up dental floss.
What I find particularly disturbing in the picture in which she is bent over, showing everyone the Rack O’ Lamb, is what I can only describe as … boob condoms. I suspect they are the infamous stick-on bras, which allege that they will provide the wearers with support, which is a Total Lie – as brilliantly illustrated here.
And shame on the costume department. Given an hour in the department, and I could make her look as if she fills out the dress naturally. Someone lost track of the fact that the bosom should go up, not down, in order to look well in a formal ball gown.
Wow…I hadn’t seen the second pic..nor the first pic that er large before!
Yikes! I agree with Audrey! I have seen too many brides–well, one is too many, so I have seen more than too many brides with gowns like this. And why is it always the flat-chested girls that pick them? Even those who are well-endowed curiously decide to order a size too large. Whenever they sit down, slouch, turn around, walk, stand still–whatever–you can see straight down their dress. And no, no bra.