Archive - January, 2008

Jenna Bush’s dresses by the numbers

I was deeply engrossed in Style Scoop when my little eye happened upon this intersection of the nuptial and the presidential:

Gosh, dontcha just hate having too many options?

Whether you give two toots about Jenna Bush’s May 10th wedding to Henry Hager (I don’t, oddly enough), it’s beyond cool to see all of the potential dress designs. As Style Scoop tells it, the first lady (hey, should I be capitalizing that?) asked twelve notable designers to submit sketches of the gown that may just clothe her daughter on said daughter’s special day.

The twelve designs sprang forth from the minds of the following designers (from one to twelve): Vera Wang, J. Mendel, Arnold Scaasi, Carlos Miele, Amsale, Carmen Marc Valvo, Angel Sanchez, Badgley Mischka, Nicole Miller, Lela Rose, Marc Bouwer, and Oscar de la Renta.

My personal favorite is number nine, but I have always fancied those Nicole Miller ruffles. Number one looks like it ought to be in the annual toilet paper gown contest. Three gets a big ol’ yawn from me, but all things considered it does look sort of right for a White House wedding. Eight is too daring for the same, and I have nothing to say about seven other than that the cartoon model looks entirely undead.

Which, pray tell, do you favor?

Boxier frocks, pants suits, and coats, oh my!

The designers of a good portion of today’s MOB/MOG wear would have you believe that every proud momma is trim, toned, and ready to show off her dangerous curves. It’s a nice thought, but you guys have always been quick to tell me that your moms don’t quite fit that ambitious mold. I know from personal experience that my own MOG was rather nonplussed at the dresses my MOB was eying, as their body types couldn’t possibly be more different than they already are.

I’m not saying that moms of all shapes and sizes shouldn’t consider wearing something that’s a little more slinky than it is boxy, but there is definitely a contingent of moms out there who’d rather keep their assets to themselves, thankyouverymuch.

Full coverage doesn’t mean sacrificing shapeAnd then there’s the SASS!

Sydney’s Closet is a pretty reliable dress source if you’re looking to “size up glamour,” though their selection definitely features a staggering number of what I like to call MILF dresses. If mom doesn’t see anything she likes in the MOB section, point her toward the straight up formal wear area.

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Mii+Mii=Wii

It seems that there’s no denying the crossover points between modern nuptials and Nintendo. Previously, we’ve seen the Super Mario wedding cake and the stacked console cake with a GameCube on top. Now gamer gals and grooms who are so inclined can replace the boring old bride and groom cake toppers with custom created Miis.

mii and mii makes wii?

You can’t argue with the popularity of the Wii! Paul Pape, Lindsey Pape, and perhaps certain other unnamed artists will whip you up a couple of Miis made to match your own for the relatively low price of $100 to $200, depending on options. The higher end topper is entirely customized — each Mii is wearing whatever you’ll be wearing on your wedding day.

I’m no topper fan when it comes to generics, but I love things like this. With many of the custom jobs out there starting at about $500 per piece, I’d suggest jumping on Paul’s offer if you happen to be a Nintendo junkie. Just don’t tell him how reasonable his prices are, lest he up them because he can!

Too, too, too many moms? Or mom-o-rama?

The question of whether one can have too many moms is a complex one. Some people are of the opinion that one is far more than any single person ought to need while others welcome the presence of matriarchal influences in all facets of their lives. It is an intensely personal conundrum that demands a great deal of introspective thought.

Beware! They’re not just here to hang around!

The question of whether one can have too many moms at a wedding…now that really depends on the moms. Gone are the days where we can assume that the bride has one mom and the groom has one mom. Perhaps the bride-to-be’s father has remarried, bringing a step-mother into the mix. Her mom has come out as a lesbian and has also taken a wife. The bride herself is close to each of the three moms and has dreams of including them all in her nuptials.

Then there’s the groom-to-be. His father, surprisingly, has come out as a homosexual, but his mate is currently living as a woman for whatever reasons. His mother has never remarried (though she kept her married name) and she lives right down the block from the marriage venue and has become very, very involved in the proceedings. Like his intended, the groom is close to all of these individuals. In fact, the whole family is quite tight!

Holy moly, that’s a lot of moms, all of whom may want to emulate the MOG by helping the bride-to-be choose her dress, criticizing the groom-to-be’s musical tastes, participating in the ceremony, making a speech at the reception, wearing a corsage, walking in the pre-processional, recessing, doing a reading, and so on. Yipes!

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Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness

Hey, guys! It’s time for another round of Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness!

For those who are here for the first time, here’s how it works: I post a picture, you reply in comments with the best caption you can come up with, and next saturday, I declare a winner.

This week, I have to give a very special shout out to our own Never teh Bride for discovering and passing on this…very special photograph. Truly, I am glad I wasn’t trying to eat or drink anything when it arrived in my inbox, so you might want to put anything you’re eating or drinking down about now. No really.

And here it is:
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Maybe I Hit On a Trend After All

In a recent article here, I begged wedding gown designers to offer us something they haven’t in years: sleeves. I truly thought I was whistling in the wind and it would take a very long time to see any sort of action on this request.

Lo and behold, yesterday I went shopping in my local bookstore and paused before the magazine rack, only to see this looking back at me from the display:

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Be a Celebrity! Or Just Use the Same Words to Get Married

As I was merrily surfing the web, I ran across a site for wedding vows. What fun! I love wedding vows! No, really, I do. In truth, the vows are the single most important part of a wedding. This is what makes the whole thing legally binding and what all the fun window dressing of pretty clothes, delicious food, and beautiful music are there to celebrate.

The part of this particular site that rather tickled my particular sense of humor was the section of Celebrity Vows. Yes, you can now choose the same wedding vows used by Bruce Willis and Demi Moore, or Marilyn Monroe and Arthur Miller. Actually, most of them are pretty much standard forms from various protestant denominations, and not that unusual.

There was, however, one part in one ceremony that caught my eye. I’d like to share it with you. It comes from Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward’s wedding. While it’s not the vows, per se, it strikes me as a particularly wonderful way of expressing what marriage is really all about:

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the Art of Marriage: The little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say ‘I love you’ at least once a day. It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue through all the years. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have wings of an angel. It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding room for the things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal. It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

And I think that sort of says it all.

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