Why don’t you talk to her about it and see what she’d prefer? Say something like “I’m so excited about your pregnancy, and don’t want you to do anything that will jeopardize your health or delivery, or effect your finances when you’ve got a baby on the way. If you don’t think you can do it, I won’t be hurt if you want to step down. Or if you want to try to participate, let’s find ways to make it work for both of us.” Make it easy on her by not expecting too many demanding tasks from her, let her sit down during the ceremony and rehersal, and don’t delegate anything to her that would be a disaster if she can’t make it at the last minute.

I’m actually surprised your MOH hasn’t stepped down of her own accord, as I’ve seen lots of preggers message board posts that could be summarized, “I just found out my due date is five days before the wedding and I don’t know what to tell the bride, I feel terrible but I’m afraid to drop out!”

Have you talked to your MOH about this? What’s her take on the whole thing? Ultimately, I don’t think it would make you a ‘zilla to bring up your concerns, but not because you don’t want it to be your problem. A lot of fit-to-burst mommas-to-be aren’t comfortable standing for a rehearsal and ceremony. It might not do for her to travel when she could potentially go into labor. She may be waiting for you to say something!

On the other hand, don’t be surprised if she’s hurt if you ask her to step down. A lot of other preggers ladies on those message boards say things like, “I was due right about then, but we figured it all out, and I knew my friend would understand if I couldn’t make it.” After all, your other maids could break a leg or just plain get the flue the day before your wedding and there’s nothing you can do about that, either. There are no guarantees where human beings are concerned.

In your heart, you probably have an inkling of how your friend will react if you ask her to step down. Personally, I’d tread carefully if your main worry is the potential for stress caused by an uneven wedding party.

But seriously … maybe we should e-mail this British journalist to explain that the vast majority of Americans don’t actually do things like this!

Off subject: NtB I have been trying to read your Manolo for the Home blog but every time I go to click to expand a post or comment the page reloads and the ad bar moves from the side of the screen to the middle. No new text shows up and I can’t ever get the comments to open. I’ve tried it on several different computers with no luck…it’s been like this for about 3 weeks now.