Mini Me? I’d Rather Not
By TwistieDuring my childhood and youth, flower girls wore different colors of dresses, different hairstyles, different shoes, and carried different flowers, but they all had one thing in common: they were dressed as little girls.
If they wore white dresses, they were simple and designed to flatter a small child’s figure and often had colored sashes. More often they wore pastel dresses that toned with the bridal party. Make up? Didn’t happen, unless it was a tiny dab of clear or pale pink lip gloss.
When did we start turning flower girls into the brides in Tom Thumb Weddings?
A quick glance through the offerings at David’s Bridal turned up this:
and this:
and this:
Each of them is more than a hundred dollars, can’t be worn again for any purpose other than dress up play, and requires other expensive accessories like veils. On top of all that, they are shown with elaborate updos and full makeup. The dresses are built to show off curves these little girls don’t have yet. I find the look frankly disturbing.
Looking at other sites for flower girl dresses turned up some even more extreme versions of the same phenomenon.
I don’t know about you, but I much prefer something like this:
It’s cute, it’s appropriate for a little girl, and it’s less than fifty dollars, so even if she doesn’t want to wear it again, it’s not an unreasonable expense for her parents.
Let the kids in wedding parties look like kids. Let them wear something comfortable they can have fun in at the reception. Save their parents a little cash. It’s the thoughtful thing to do.
February 10th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
I keep seeing commercials for wedding venues which feature small children wearing over-sized clothes acting out a relationship in snapshots; meeting, proposing, and marrying on the grounds of the venue.
I know it’s supposed to be a cutesy dress up sort of thing, but frankly I find it disturbing.
February 10th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
My flower girl’s mother picked her dress before I picked mine, and I didn’t even see it until the day before the wedding, IIRC. It kind of straddled the line between little-girl and little-bride, being quite froofy and all white and beaded and lacy. But it was very very HER (she IS a little princess), and the mother got it from southeast Asia at a flea market for $25, so I can’t complain too much.
I do remember looking at the dresses at David’s and being very disappointed in the flower girl dresses. But I have the same problem when I walk through the kid’s sections at Target. They just shouldn’t be dressing like they’re three to seven times their age!
February 10th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
Ugh, my niece is going to be a flower girl in a wedding in June. The bride wants her dress to match her dress including the precise shade of ivory. This little girl will be 2 and half!
February 11th, 2008 at 12:01 am
I find those dresses bad, but not as bad as the overly flowerly, fairy-princess-or-is-that-an-elf dresses.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:51 am
To my eyes, this is just another step down the road to turn little girls into “big girls”. For years, moms have been struggling trying to find clothing for girls under the age of 12 that did not look the same as the clothing that was being pushed toward teenagers (and we all know what message that clothing is sending). Then, there was the whole Britney Spears thing. My girls are way beyond this now, but I think it’s a huge mistake to put little girls into clothing that is obviously “older” – it goes along with makeup for little girls, heels for little girls, etc. Now, having said that, I realize that kids today have much bigger feet than they did 20 years ago, so finding shoes for a 10 year old who is already wearing a women’s size 6 is a real challenge, but I think one that is worth it.
February 12th, 2008 at 2:26 am
Ever heard the term “prostitot”?
Because, yeah.
JonBenet Ramsey much?
(the little brown dress is too sweet, though. Laura Ingalls Wilder, yes! Icky pedo beauty contestants, NO!)
February 14th, 2008 at 6:16 am
Have to agree with you on this one, especially about the sicko, showing off non-existent curves thing. Wrong! I love the little brown dress. It is charming, appropriate and looks like it “twirls” which, according to my nieces, is a big factor in a pretty dress!
February 17th, 2008 at 12:11 am
I am so glad you posted about this! I totally agree that flower girls should NOT look like mini brides. They can dress like brides on their own wedding day and (if it is part of their faith), for their first communion. I just don’t get why the little girl should be in a white. If I were to have a flower girl, I would go for a shade of the bridesmaid color or just a regular pastel dress. Just wanted to chime in and thank you for mentioning this & for suggesting alternatives!
Enjoy the long weekend!
February 17th, 2008 at 10:27 am
I couldn’t agree more. I didn’t realize until I started planning my own wedding that flower girls so often look like baby brides. I interpreted this as some sort of the-world-revolves-around-me mania on the part of brides, that everything should be created in their image. I figured my (six-year-old) flower girl should look like one of the wedding party, since that’s what she was, and she got a lighter-colored version of the dress the bridesmaids were wearing – except the bridesmaids’ dresses were empire-waisted and cut for grown women, and the flower girl dress was cut very much like the brown one above, for a little girl. (And, it cost $12.95 from a really cool seller on ebay that makes these dresses new in a ton of sizes and ships them all over the US. “Angel” is in the seller’s name somewhere. What an awesome idea! Don’t have to find a brick-and-mortar store, can get any size or color you need, and surely doesn’t break the bank.)
This spaghetti straps (etc.) on kindergardeners thing is positively evil, in my opinion. And didn’t some company in Australia make PADDED Bratz bras for girls who have nothing to put a bra on? How is it that an entire industry is blissfully unaware that this age group is vulnerable to victimization at the hands of child molesters as it is? Don’t dress them like they want sexual attention. They don’t.