Comments on: Tips For a Kid-Friendly Wedding

By: Tizzy

Tizzy — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 22:52:29 +0000

At my cousin’s wedding last summer the bride and groom ordered an assortment of toys from http://www.orientaltrading.com/ I have fabulous pictures of my cousins and their children playing with a set of mini beach balls on the lawn outside the reception venue.

At my FSIL’s wedding last summer her cousin’s parents brought board games and plunked them in a corner in the back of the reception hall where they could see them from their table but still talk to the grown ups. Of course, most people can’t trust their elementary schoolers to play that nicely together.

One thing I’m considering is seating each child with their parents but also setting aside a kids table with toys, coloring books and a stash of picky kid foods like juice boxes and string cheese. That way kids can sit down and play (or eat together) with out worrying about place settings or annoying the grown ups.

By: Twistie

Twistie — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 14:49:57 +0000

Carol, I absolutely agree that bringing uninvited guests of any age to a wedding is terribly improper, and I’m sorry you had to go through that, but these tips were meant for people who specifically wish to invite children.

By: La BellaDonna

La BellaDonna — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 14:46:45 +0000

And Carol’s unfortunate, unpleasant experience explains why some folks are putting the socially-inappropriate legend, “Adults Only,” on their wedding invitations - because it is apparently not enough to issue an invitation specifying the people invited; one must also specify the people NOT invited, because otherwise, the ill-mannered will drag along anyone else along they, and not the people hosting the event, deem appropriate.

Carol, I’m sorry you had to deal with that, it shouldn’t have happened. As far as the folks who are now appending “Adults Only” to invitations in an effort to keep that from happening - no, it’s not appropriate, but they shouldn’t HAVE to do that. I understand the impulse that drives them to it, though, and I’m willing to cut them more slack than I am the people who bring along eight uninvited children to a wedding. They are, of course, the same people who do NOT removing a howling infant from a church (or restaurant, or movie, etc.).

By: Carol

Carol — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 02:05:45 +0000

It’s very annoying when you plan an adult wedding, don’t invite children, and your husband’s cousins decide to bring eight children anyway (including one newborn that wailed through the whole ceremony - the parents never took the poor tot outside - I could hardly hear the priest though standing right in front of him) .

By: Lynn

Lynn — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 14:48:43 +0000

I am a big supporter of having the kids walk the aisle and then sit with a family member during the service. I also suggest you have kid snacks around for before the wedding for your small attendants. There is nothing worse than a flower girl with low blood sugar.
As a mom, this might sound bad, but if my child doesn’t have a task at the wedding I would rather not bring them. Without the kids a wedding is a romantic and fun date for me and my husband. With the kids, I end up sitting with my daughter as my husband walks around outside with our son who can’t seem to stop wiggling or feels the need to whisper a thousand questions. I have well behaved kids for the most part, but there is no way I would trust my 4 year old to be on his own at a kids table. Without the kids I can talk my husband into dancing with me, but with the kids I’m lucky to get one dance without one of the children cutting in, that is if we make it to the recpetion at all. I choose not to take my children to a reception where alcohol is served, or stay any later than about 9 at night. Unless the kids are just really close to the bride or groom (like an uncle or something) I see no reason to make them attend the wedding.

By: Twistie

Twistie — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 14:36:15 +0000

Hee! What a great pic, Toni! Sounds like you had a really fun reception.

By: Toni

Toni — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 21:06:26 +0000

Yeah, we invited lots of little cousins, and included a “kids corner” in the reception hall, which included a TV showing cartoons, and games. Of course, some of the big kids had fun with the toys too.

By: Twistie

Twistie — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 17:19:42 +0000

Thanks, Melissa! And thanks for the great added advice to parents, as well. That’s a great tip I didn’t think of.

By: Melissa B.

Melissa B. — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 08:47:52 +0000

Great advice, Twistie! I may have mentioned it here before, but when I was a kid I hated going to weddings. I was generally very well-behaved and patient, but I was not a big fan of church, and once the bride came down the aisle the ceremony was basically another church service. Also, my brother and I were almost always the only kids there (our parents had us relatively late in life, we were generally 10-15 years younger than most of their friends’ kids), so there was no kids’ table, no crayons and no mac and cheese option.

90% of the time, we sucked it up and behaved ourselves, and ate lots of cake at the end. But the one and only public temper tantrum I ever had was at my uncle’s wedding at age 5 — I was bored stiff and frustrated and when my parents said I couldn’t have the cake topper, I lost it and started bawling. My parents hauled my butt out of there super-quick and let me cool down in the bathroom.

Hmm, after thinking about my own experiences, I have another suggestion, this one for guests: if your kids are attending a wedding where there will be very few other children, bring some books or crayons and snacks for them. If your kid suddenly won’t touch salmon, having some string cheese and crackers along could be a lifesaver! And nothing combats boredom like a new coloring book.