Let’s Hear It FROM the Boys!

FULL DISCLOSURE: I’m knocked up. There’s a bun in my oven. I am heavy — well, not yet — with child. I’ve got a stowaway in my gullet. There is a person growing in my uterus. Etc., etc. Why am I telling you this? Besides the fact that it’s fun to spill the beans, I can also tie it in nicely with today’s topic. You see, I’m currently trying to get The Beard to write a pre-baby blog, the same way I tried to get him to write a groom blog when we were planning the wedding. That is to say, to no avail.

Which brings me to my main point. There’s a total drought of groom blogs out there. Oh, you get plenty of results when searching for groom’s blogs, but most went defunct long before the associated wedding. I suppose you could argue that there’s just not enough out there to occupy the average groom-to-be’s attention, but no one is saying that dudes should be blogging about bridal shoes, floral arrangements, or table linens. I’d be satisfied with a blog filled with groom-centric grousing about high prices, meddling relatives, and the Electric Slide.

Contrary to what popular culture tells us, not all men are grunting barbarians who think wedding planning is for sissies and girls. As tongue-in-cheek as it is, I don’t like Brideorama’s Top 11 Reasons Its NOT a Good Idea to Put The Groom In Charge of the Wedding list because it promotes unfair stereotypes. Find me one groom-to-be who actually wants his groomsmen in tie-dye t-shirts and his wedding vows to include the words, “Whatever, dude.” Heck, I would have happily eloped, but The Beard wanted a wedding with all the pomp and circumstance!

Grooms should be sharing their experiences, if a survey by Bridal Guide is any indication. According to respondants, 42% of engaged couples plan their weddings together, flatly ignoring the kind of advice my father gave The Beard, i.e., “Shut up and get out of the bride’s way.” It makes sense, considering how many men and women are paying for all or part of their own weddings. If a guy is dropping $5,000 for cake, music, a site, and transportation, he’s going to want to have his say.

After some Googling, I found two active blogs for grooms, one of which is the blog associated with GroomGroove so it doesn’t really count. The other, I Groomzille…You Bride, has been around since July, is written by an actual groom-to-be, and the author is involved in his wedding in a decidedly dude-ish way.

If your guy is at all involved in planning your wedding, why not suggest that he start a blog about it? He could also be a contributing writer on your blog if you have one. It won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, of course, but I really think that we here in the wide world of online wedding writing could use a dose of testosterone.

31 Responses to “Let’s Hear It FROM the Boys!”

  1. Jennie September 10, 2008 at 11:47 am #

    Fan-freaking-tastic! Congratulations to NtB and The Beard!

  2. blablover5 September 10, 2008 at 11:47 am #

    My guy has done a ton of stuff for the wedding and he did do one post on my blog a while back.

    Alas he gets the writers block really bad and over thinks things to an insane degree so if he had a blog it would have one post and then a whole bunch he started and then deleted.

  3. blablover5 September 10, 2008 at 11:48 am #

    Oh and congrats on the little bun. Just don’t tell me you’re gonna call him/her peanut on cards and stuff.

  4. Kristin September 10, 2008 at 11:57 am #

    The groom writing for Groomzille is also posting on WeddingBee under the moniker of Mr. Mango. http://www.weddingbee.com/author/mrmango/ He doesn’t write as often as the other brides do, but it’s certainly a great perspective!

  5. Never teh Bride September 10, 2008 at 12:11 pm #

    Jennie: Thank you!!

    Blablover: Aw, I’ll excuse guys who aren’t keen on putting their thoughts down on virtual paper. Blogging isn’t for everyone! As for peanuts, so far we’ve avoided calling the person in my gut anything but the baby. No peanuts here!

    Kristen: Thanks for the link — I had no idea he was blogging at the Bee!

    (I apparently love exclamation points today…)

  6. Twistie September 10, 2008 at 12:19 pm #

    Damn. If I didn’t live on the opposite side of the country, I’d offer to babysit anytime.

    You know, when appropriate. Like after it’s born.

    Oh, hell, if you ever need a babysitter in California, I’m your girl!

    Congratulations, NtB and The Beard! A smaller version of the two of you strikes me as a Very Good Idea.

  7. Bitter September 10, 2008 at 12:36 pm #

    Are you looking for blogs only dedicated to groom issues? I suspect they will never be a big topic for men to start a dedicated blog. However, I bet that if you searched for blogs that are written by men who happen to be getting married, you’d find many more with categories that feature those types of posts.

    Sebastian is a big time blogger, and I suspect that when we do start really making plans enough to start putting down deposits and the like, he’ll blog much of it from the groom’s perspective. But he’s not going to start a brand new blog for it, they will likely be posts in their own little category.

  8. kelly September 10, 2008 at 12:40 pm #

    Here’s another: the engaged guy

  9. Kitten September 10, 2008 at 12:44 pm #

    Congratulations, mommy-to-be!! I’d love to read a good groom’s blog, but my hubby had no interest in attempting anything of the sort. Sigh.

  10. Leah September 10, 2008 at 1:30 pm #

    CONGRATULATIONS! I’m so happy for you and your family!

    I had read some of The Engaged Guy (http://engagedguy.blogspot.com/) but kinda fell out of it when I realized I wasn’t that interested in the couple. He does blog about groom-y stuff, though. Maybe it was just a personal taste on my part.

  11. Never teh Bride September 10, 2008 at 1:40 pm #

    Twistie: Thanks! And I’ll keep that in mind! :-) It would be kind of weird for you to babysit now…a fetus doesn’t really need all that much supervision, as far as I can tell.

    Bitter: That’s what bums me out — it’s hard to find the blogs not dedicated to the topic because they don’t come up in search results that easily.

    kelly: Thanks, I totally forgot about the Engaged Guy. I didn’t realize he was still posting. It looks like they got married ten days ago…hopefully, he’ll blog about it!

    Kitten and Leah: Thank you very much!

  12. Melissa B. September 10, 2008 at 2:39 pm #

    Congrats NtB!! What wonderful news.

    On the “groom blog” front, on occasion, some of the fiances/husbands of the Weddingbee brides have written really great posts. In particular, I remember Mr. Hummingbird wrote a really sweet and funny entry about his absolutely disastrous wedding morning.

  13. Toni September 10, 2008 at 2:40 pm #

    Congrats!

  14. 7nina September 10, 2008 at 4:05 pm #

    Congrats NtB!

  15. Omnibus Driver September 10, 2008 at 4:46 pm #

    Congratulations! Do you suppose we can get Twistie to throw you an online baby shower?

  16. Polka Dot Bride September 10, 2008 at 8:44 pm #

    Congratulations on the bun!

    Secondly I totally agree- there is also Groomify.

  17. Jane Canuck September 11, 2008 at 9:04 am #

    Congratulations NtB!! All the best to you and the Beard and your new plus one.

  18. La BellaDonna September 11, 2008 at 9:21 am #

    Congratulations, NtB! I’m very happy for you. I remember back to when you were despairing of ever hearing ” … Will You … ”

    This is a very happy post-script to those days of uncertainty.

  19. Never teh Bride September 11, 2008 at 9:34 am #

    Thanks, everyone!!

    La BellaDonna: It certainly was touch and go there for a while ;-)

  20. La Petite Acadienne September 11, 2008 at 10:16 am #

    Congrats NtB! That’s great news! I definitely agree with Twistie that having a smaller version of you and The Beard in the world is a VERY good thing.

    Side note: The Stonecutter and I are currently attempting to reproduce, so hopefully some of your good news will rub off on me!

  21. Twistie September 11, 2008 at 11:36 am #

    Omnibus Driver, I will certainly take that suggestion under advisement.

    La Petite Acadienne, I will keep my fingers crossed for you and The Stonecutter. A tiny NtB isn’t the only good idea.

  22. Never teh Bride September 11, 2008 at 9:53 pm #

    La Petite Acadienne: Thank you! I hear pregnancy is catching, so I’ll send some preggers vibes flying in your direction :-)

  23. Camilla September 12, 2008 at 6:34 am #

    Congratulations!

  24. Guilty Secret September 12, 2008 at 11:11 am #

    Congratulations!

  25. ladyjane September 12, 2008 at 3:31 pm #

    Aww! I just did a little happy dance for you, NtB :)

    Alas, the FI’s strength is in verbalization, not writing. But I think part of the problem is that many men are like him in that they hesitate to reveal their innermost thoughts and feelings to strange, online people.

  26. Tizzy September 13, 2008 at 5:36 pm #

    Congratulations! That’s so exciting!!!

    My fiance is not the blogging sort but he did spend a night in front of the tv looking at bridal magazines recently. He wanted to know what my taste was and to see the things I was trying to describe to him. He is also in charge of various things like the DJ because he cares more about those things than I do.

  27. Glinda September 15, 2008 at 10:16 pm #

    That is so very exciting! Congratulations and I am very happy for you and the Beard!

  28. Never teh Bride September 16, 2008 at 11:20 am #

    Thanks, Glinda — I’m collecting all of the parenting tips I can from the comment section of Teeny Manolo…hopefully I’m internalizing all the right ones!

  29. raincoaster September 27, 2008 at 8:30 pm #

    Sounds like a possible new blog for the Manolosphere!

    Congratulations! What are a blogmother’s obligations under these circumstances? Miss Manners is shockingly silent on the matter.

  30. Never teh Bride September 29, 2008 at 11:18 am #

    I’m laughing right now, raincoaster, because last night I dreamt that the Manolo had added a whole bunch of blogs to his roster…blogs like Manolo for the Cats and Pregnant Manolo.

    I think a blogmother’s main obligations are to look fabulous and to compliment my baby at all possible opportunities ;-)

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    [...] Dearest readers, in case you have not yet heard, the Manolosphere’s very own Never teh Bride has shared the exciting news that she is pregnant! [...]