One of the thornier issues that comes up when planning a wedding is the menu. No matter what you do, someone is going to be unhappy with what you choose to serve. This only becomes more true if you are planning not to serve either or both of two popular items: alcohol and meat.

For some reason, there are a great many people who cannot wrap their heads around the concept that meat is not necessary in every meal or that it’s possible to have a good time without an alcoholic drink. The fact is it’s perfectly possible to have not only a delicious but a completely satisfying meal sans meat and it’s more than possible to have a blast without a glass of bubbly.

Chances are, though, that at least one or two people on your guest list would be skeptical of my claims in this regard.

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Just when I think I can’t love this job more than I do, all of you wonderful readers prove that you’re even more deranged and delightful than I’d realized. You really made me sweat about picking a winner for this one.

Last week, I presented you all with this lovely (if somewhat disturbing) image:

and you slapped me right back with nine gloriously askew responses.

In the end, though, there can only be one winner. This week, that winner is Fabrisse for tickling my funny bone with this culinarily creeptastic caption:

Thank you for volunteering.

So, the first course will be lark pate, followed by rabbit stew, …

Congratulations, Fabrisse, and thanks to everyone who played!

Oh, and I’d like an invitation to that reception, please. I’ve never tried lark pate.