I did a lot of other things too – got my “trousseau” at Wal-Mart (they sell some pretty things in white), bridesmaid dresses at Chadwick’s for $79, and shoes (mine and the bridesmaids’) for $10 at Payless, flowers from Sam’s Club (roses in bulk, and I handmade all the bouquets and boutonnieres), made the invitations and programs myself with a color printer (they all turned out well), asked a friend to take the pictures, ordered three 12″ cakes and put them on matching mixed-height cake stands (my mother and MIL happened to have a set of three between them that MATCHED. They had never met before my DH and I started dating), had some VERY talented and extremely gracious friends do the music for the ceremony, and skipped things I didn’t want (like videography and a limousine). Tuxes at Men’s Wearhouse. Flower girl dress (to match the bridesmaids, not the bride) from a seller on eBay who makes lovely new ones for $12.95 (at that time, anyway). Semi-precious stone necklaces and Cross pens as wedding party gifts, also new from eBay. We did a buffet for the reception but the restaurant (a beautiful historic inn, believe it or not) was amazing and did a great job with the food. Cash bar but with wine carafes on the tables (one red, one sparkling for the toast), open bar for soda and juice, and a few hundred for open for mixed drinks (when it was gone, it was gone). Weddingringhotline.com for the rings (they did a perfect job on the inscription and shipped really promptly). Made the centerpieces (I repotted miniature rose plants – I love miniature roses).

I did a lot of clever (and some lucky) things and swung it all on $5500 – all of my savings, but I’m not as proud of anything as that dress.

Things I would do differently – invite about two dozen more people (even if they couldn’t make it, I would have liked to ask them). Skip flowers for a church that was already magnificent; the arrangements I made never got put out, which didn’t really matter, because they were just not on a large enough scale (and they were pretty big). Try harder to drink in the day of (I micromanage).

And I’ve heard a few ideas since then that I really like – including individual cakes as table centerpieces. What a fabulous idea!

Our ceremony and reception is being held in one location and for our reception they are allowing us to hook our iPod up to their sound system. My FH is looking forward to putting together the playlist and it gives him something to work on for the wedding that he is truly interested in (ie not flowers).

We are also making our own invitations, response cards, table numbers, and placecards. It won’t be overcomplicated but simple/elegant and something we can do at home. We picked our’s up from Target but I am sure there are a ton of other places available.

Overall, just be patient, shop around and you will find the best deals on items. Good luck!!

Look for party venues instead of wedding venues. Especially look for free venues like clubhouses that a relative belongs to, the meeting rooms at a family member’s church, or, if you are connected to the military, an on post location. Before you look for somewhere inexpensive, make sure you haven’t overlooked somewhere free.

Look for decorations that can serve another purpose (like holiday themed ones) or can travel – we decorated the chapel with clusters of balloons in our colors tied to sand weights and had a helpful guest move them to the reception site in her van. Look for wholesale flower markets as opposed to a florist’s shop – they’ve got all the talent without the markup if you are willing to pick up your flowers instead of having them delivered. Also, the flowers are fresher than you would get from a florist (wholesalers turn around and sell to stores who then turn around and sell to you). If you don’t have a wholesaler nearby, make use of big box stores (if it isn’t against your moral code) – a dozen red roses from Sam’s Club smell just as sweet.

Rent one.

Costume shops usually have vintage gowns that they will rent. You may be able to rent the bridesmaids’ gowns, too. It doesn’t have to be costumey, either; I have some stunners that are as gorgeous & timeless as ever.

For my wedding, I went to the local florist and asked for table bouquets for a party, not for a wedding. That cut several hundred off of the price immediately. I also ordered freeze-dried peony petals from the web, which were gorgeous, looked and smelled fresh, and were about 1/4 the price of fresh. I didn’t carry a bouquet, which was a personal choice, but if you want one, there’s no law stating you have to order a whole wedding’s worth of flowers when you order a bouquet.

We had a cocktail reception (with beer and wine- cash bar for liquor) with great, out of the ordinary finger food (I can NOT spell hors d’euvres), at the local museum’s cafe (which was gorgeous and MUCH less expensive than anywhere else we could find) and we had more time with the guests than a sit-down dinner reception. We also made compilations of jazz and Rat Pack songs for atmosphere, with room for dancing if anyone wanted to. There are so many ways to do things a little less expectedly, for a good price, without looking cheap, and while making it a memorable event. People still compliment us on our wedding and on such a good time everyone had (and also say they enjoyed themselves much more than at bigger, more traditional receptions). Think about what reflects you, not what tradition demands for the reception.

eBay is a potentially inexpensive source for all manner of things. We used it for print-your-own invitations as well as my tiara.

And before we worried about centerpieces, we asked the hall what was included in our deal with them. It turns out that they were willing to include simple centerpieces with marbles & a hurricane glass, if we provided for the candles. Done! (Candles didn’t come from eBay but we certainly bought them online, as we bought many many things.)