The blog The Simple Dollar recently did a series that included posts on having a reasonable courtship, a reasonable engagement, and of course, a reasonable Wedding. Naturally, by reasonable, the author means “not costing an arm and a leg.” Nowadays I’m hearing conflicting reports about wedding spending these days, with articles like Brides on a Budget: 75% of Weddings Being Scaled Back and Wedding spend climbs 5.2 percent both appearing in my inbox. Still, there are a lot of budget brides out there, and all budget wedding advice is not created equal. I thought it would be fun to take a look at some of The Simple Dollar’s advice.

Start your planning as far in advance of the wedding as possible. Set a tentative date as quickly as possible and start planning as soon as you can, even if you’re planning something very simple.

Doing so may let you lock in prices on wedding venues, hotels, and entertainment costs, but there are no guarantees. Making reservations early is simply the best way to ensure you can reserve the wedding venues and vendors you really like. That said, don’t let your zest for making those early reservations keep you from researching wedding services before putting down deposits, because hasty decision making can blow your wedding budget in no time.

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Save us a chocolate egg or three!

On Tuesday, Vermont became the fourth state in the US to legalize same-sex marriage. The really different thing this time is that Vermont is the first state to do it with a vote of the legislature.

A few days prior to the announcement, the Vermont legislature had voted to extend marriage rights to same-sex couples, but were four short of the number of votes needed to override a veto by the governor. Governor Jim Douglas vetoed the bill on Monday. On Tuesday, several House members switched sides to override the veto. Vermont has no mechanism for a voter referendum to overturn the vote of the legislature.

In addition to this, and on the same day, the D.C. Council voted 12 – 0 to recognize legally performed same-sex marriages from other states. Washington D.C has recognized domestic partnerships created in other states, but this is the first time that same-sex marriages have been recognized by the governing body of the nation’s capitol.

In New Hampshire, the issue of same-sex marriage rights has passed the House and is now awaiting action by the Senate. Maine and New Jersey are also currently arguing the question in their legislatures. Here in my home state of California, the state Supreme Court must issue its ruling on the constitutionality of Proposition 8 which banned same-sex marriage by early June.

This is already a significant year for proponents and supporters of marriage equality. My personal hope is that 2009 will become even more significant well before it’s over.

The lovely class-factotum sent me a link to this, er, interesting wedding cake:

While I understand that the truck is supposed to be off-roading its way up the side of the cake, the colors chosen to represent mud or a stream bed or whatever that’s supposed to be makes it seem as if the vehicle has spewed hot and dirty exhaust particles onto each tier as it made its way up toward the top. Soiled wedding cake? Trust me when I say that it’s never a good look.

• The Manolosphere’s very own Francesca recently wrote a wonderful article for Jewish Week entitled When Not Just the Glass Is Broken. In it she explores matrimonial mishaps that go above and beyond Aunt Edna getting lost on the way to the ceremony venue. And speaking of Jewish weddings, check out Cool Ketubah for a Ketubah that “projects the perfect balance between visual sophistication and poetic sentiment.”
• Know a space-case looking for a wedding gown?
  

  This number designed by Prina Tornai might just fit the bill. You can thank me later.

• Couples celebrating their marriage at a Ritz-Carlton Hotel or Resort can donate 5% of the total food revenue from their reception equally between a charity of their own choosing and an organization supported by The Ritz-Carlton’s Community Footprints Fund through the venue’s “A Vow To Help Others” program. If you’re getting married there — lucky you! — prior to December 31, 2010, you can take advantage of the program.
• Oh, and by the way, the “Say ‘I Do’ With Mirassou” contest is back. Fill out their contest entry form for a chance to win $10,000; a trip to New York City for a 4-hour dream wedding consultation with a Brides.com editor; and an elegant Reed & Barton 5-piece dinner service for eight, 5-piece flatware for eight, and 3-piece crystal stemware for eight. The contest ends at 11:59:59 PM EST on June 19, 2009.

It’s that time again, by which I mean the earth has circled the sun just enough times to make people think once again that asking strangers to pay for their weddings is an original and inspired idea. As I said back in 2006, “The idea is not new, of course. Michael Palmer and Kristi Laurita created the now defunct www.weddingbills.com. Someone named Cynthia created www.payforcynthiaswedding.com in an effort to raise $25,000. And CyberBeg and DonateMoney2Me remain as active as ever.”

Some of these sites offer advertising space in exchange for contributions to a wedding fund, while others — like the new Help Me Pay For My Wedding — merely make a grab for the cash necessary to pay for a larger or more luxurious wedding.

The nameless Broke Bride-to-Be has this to say on her relatively new blog:

I have almost no money saved for my wedding. Why do I have nothing saved? Well, because the proposal was a surprise for one thing. For another, I’ve spent the past year paying off all my debt – an accomplishment I’m quite proud of, thankyouverymuch. I admit it. I spent like a maniac on things I shouldn’t have. Which is why my hair is now my natural color and I’m in last season’s jeans. The itch to spend is coming back in a big way with these wedding plans, and that is why I’m planning ahead of time to stay OUT of debt. Hence, helpmepayformywedding. If you want.

Do I know that asking for money is a bit “tacky” as so many of have called it…. yes. But, desperate times call for desperate measures. And it’s not as if I’ll announce to my guests that I solicited donations to pay for their bacon wrapped scallops. Give me some credit, people.

I want to give Broke Bride-to-Be credit about as much as I want to give her a donation. My take is and always will be that asking for donations from strangers to pay for a wedding is tres skeevy. I don’t go up to strangers to ask for money to upgrade from drip coffee to lattes or to buy those cute shoes that are just out of my price range, so it stands to reason I wouldn’t call upon strangers to foot the bill for the wedding I want but simply cannot afford. But maybe I’m alone in thinking this way… maybe soliciting donations to pay for a wedding is the new normal in these tough economic times. You tell me:

(Note: WordPress decided to randomly delete a bunch of previously approved comments on multiple posts. If like Zette and others, you don’t see your recent comments, we’d appreciate it if you repost them so we can keep the conversation going. Sorry about that!)

Remember when stills of a possible SATC wedding gown were released in anticipating of the SATC movie? What I remember is how terrible Sarah Jessica Parker (as Carrie Bradshaw) looked in that Vivienne Westwood creation… No offense to the sassy Miz P, who’s lovely, of course. It’s simply that pulling off a wedding gown with prominent bosom cups requires that one has an actual bosom. She did not, leading to cups that were definitely half empty.

That said, I am a fan of the gown itself, which boasts exaggerated lines and sculptural details likely too extreme for many. And I’m not alone. Its popularity may have inspired Westwood, who now makes custom versions of this wedding gown available for $15,000+. Is it worth it? Well, plenty of wedding gowns sell for around $15,000, so it really is up to individual brides to decide if they’d like to be Carrie for a day. Do note, however, that if you’re planning to order this gown from the Westwood boutique in London, you need to do so at least six months in advance.

A shorter reproduction of the original gown costing $9,875 sold out on net-a-porter.com, but may become available again in the future.