After reading my wonderful colleague’s post about the acquaintance of the poor chick who was branded “too fat to be a bridesmaid” by what I can only say is a very rude bride, I started thinking about choosing bridesmaids. As I suggest in the title of this post, choosing bridesmaids can be more difficult than choosing a wedding color scheme, if only because human beings have emotions. Cornflower doesn’t care if you nix it from your wedding, but your sister may be pretty pissed to find that you’re not planning to ask her to be your MOH.

Me? I chose the oldest of my younger sisters to be my MOH and The Beard’s sister as a bridesmaid, then washed my hands of the whole business of choosing bridesmaids. There were certainly friends that I could have chosen, but we were getting married out-of-state and I wasn’t sure that friends would be able to make the trip. As it was, weather turned into canceled flights, and at least three invitees were prevented by circumstance from attending. In that sense, I chose wisely, but I still wonder if my bridesmaid experience would have been less fraught with stress if I’d asked friends to be bridesmaids.

With that in my mind, I thought it was high time for a poll so readers could see how other readers chose their bridesmaids. I set it up so multiple selections are allowed, because there’s a good chance you didn’t (or won’t) choose bridesmaids based on a single criterion. So give us your answer(s) and, if you’re so inclined, tell us in the comments how your choice worked (or is working) out.

(Photo via)

Greetings caption lovers, and welcome to another edition of Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness. It’s a beautiful day for writing captions, so I hope you’re all in fine captioning fettle.

Speaking of which, I want to remind you all that if you love captions, this is not the only place in the Manolosphere where you can get your captioning groove on. Over at Teeny Manolo, they play this game every friday. And dollars to donuts, if it’s a Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness sunday over here, it’s one at Manolo for the Big Girl, too. Please come out and play at these fine blogs. We can always use more humor in our lives. And more play.

So how does one play? It’s so easy an executive at the ad agency that produces Geiko’s commercials can do it. I put before you all a picture that is simply crying out for a funny caption. You do your best to provide said caption via the comments function. Next week I declare a winner, and we all rejoice and strew flowers and suchlike in a virtual way.

Today’s image is brought to you courtesy of…I’m really not sure what, but in case it’s not work safe, I’ve placed it behind this convenient cut:
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Once common only in the South, groom’s cakes have become more and more popular over time. And why wouldn’t they? More cake is pretty much never a bad thing at a wedding. It’s an opportunity to provide another flavor, and the look is usually less formal and more whimsical than the main wedding cake.

If you decide to have a groom’s cake, there are a lot of different directions you can go. You can celebrate the groom’s hobbies:
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Let’s say that your budget didn’t allow inviting everyone and anyone to your wedding, but there are still members of your extended family and peer group who might want to know that you’ve tied the knot. Assuming these people are not close enough to you or your new spouse to have heard from you or your mother or your best friend’s mother’s coworker from the last company she worked at that you’re married, wedding announcements may come into play.

A wedding announcement is a bit like a wedding invitation with all of the scheduling info removed, in that it contains some of the same details and is frequently sent on stationery as fancy as the wedding invitations themselves. Note, however, that you don’t have to rock the ecru cardstock with black lettering if something more colorful would suit you better. The bride’s parents may have the “honour of announcing the marriage” of the new Mr. and Mrs. (or Mr. and Mr. or Mrs. and Mrs.) So-and-So, or not. A typical wedding announcement might read something like this:

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LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE! Would *I* wear it if I were getting married all over again? Maybe not — or maybe yesyesyes — but I think that this real bride is too adorable in her itty-bitty blue and pink ruffled wedding dress. What say you?

(Photos by Mike_fleming)

You might have caught me gaping like a goldfish at my radio earlier this week after listening to a program that invited listeners to call in and spout off about including registry information in wedding invitations. At the start of the segment, I was curious to hear people’s opinions but I was pretty sure that a majority of callers would speak out against registry cards or printing wedding registry information right on the invites.

Boy, was I wrong. With the exception of one or two callers, most were solidly pro registry cards! If you’ll allow me to paraphrase a few callers, I heard sentiments like “Having the registry details right there on the wedding invitation lets me buy the couple something they actually want.” and “I don’t want to have to track down the registry by calling relatives of the bride; I just want to know what she wants so I can get it.” Reeeaaally? It’s never been too much trouble for me to ring up or email the bride or the groom or someone who’d be in the know to find out where the couple is registered, but maybe that’s just me.

That’s not the only wedding etiquette rule I see losing its influence, however. Once upon a time, it was déclassé for the mother of the bride or sister of the bride or anyone else in the bride’s immediate family to host the bridal shower, but nowadays no one seems to care. I can understand the relaxation of this rule, since it’s now uncommon for the MOH or bridesmaids to live nowhere near the bride or her family. And if your bridesmaids are your sisters, what then? Other wedding etiquette rules that apparently no longer hold much sway (if the message boards I read are any indication) include asking specifically for cash in lieu of gifts, wearing white for second weddings as a no-no… and those are just the rules for the bride and groom.

I think part of the reason behind the relaxation of some wedding etiquette rules is that no one is taught them anymore. Another part might be the rejection of following rules for the rules’ sake, and it may even be that people just don’t care that much about good manners anymore. I’ll admit that I’m glad to see some rules go, like all of the ridiculous non-rules about wearing white and the rule that says that the MOB can’t host the shower even though she’s perfectly placed to host it. But asking for cash? And including registry information in an invitation? That just lets me know that you’re more concerned with getting a gift than you are with the answer on my RSVP card. Or am I simply being too old fashioned?

It’s not at all uncommon for brides and grooms to usurp interesting or pretty traditions from other cultures when planning their wedding ceremonies. And why not? When you’ve been to enough weddings that all began and ended with the same rites and rituals, the drive to differentiate yourself can be strong. USian and Canadian brides and grooms who aren’t of Native descent also have family who once upon a time called somewhere else home, and they may find the traditions of their heritage fascinating and beautiful.

Most recently I came across the wedding horseshoe, which according to different web sites is common in the UK, not at all common in the UK, frequently carried by brides, now almost never carried by brides, made of wood, made of lace, or most definitely a real horseshoe that must have been worn by an actual horse. That’s the Internet for you! Ah, well… it’s still a lovely idea. And I do think that all that good luck that can be found in an upturned horseshoe will probably still be accessible to the bride in the form of a charm or a wedding cake topper or bridal bouquet embellishment. No need to sprain your wrist or run the risk of knocking out your ring bearer!

But for the purists, here’s the skinny on wedding horseshoes.
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