The title of this post is not so much a question I want to ask as it is a question that’s been making its way around the web, causing vegans to opine at great length about their values and bacon lovers to proclaim they’ll boycott any and all meat-free wedding receptions. Why, you may ask, shouldn’t it be a question that’s, excuse the pun, on the table? Simple. It’s the bride and groom’s party, so they get to decide what is served. If they make concessions for dietary restrictions such as veganism or gluten allergies or diabetes, fantastic!
And if they don’t… well, frankly, as a vegetarian, I’ve been to weddings and events where the meat-free option was an absolutely boring plate of limp, overcooked vegetables no doubt scraped off the plates of meat eaters who turned up their noses at such a sorry side dish. It’s disappointing when that happens, and The Beard and I may have laughed at such a meager meal, but we didn’t complain to anyone or make a big deal out of it. After all, I could go to a wedding and find not one but two vegetarian options, both of which I hate. Or I could discover that I’m allergic to the main ingredient in the main dish. The host of a party should provide refreshments and a meal if it’s mealtime, but he or she is under no obligation to send you home stuffed to the gills with your favorite foods.
I mean, really, the notion that vegans shouldn’t serve a vegan (or vegetarian) menu because it is selfish – an opinion I’ve seen expressed quite a bit in the past few days – ignores the fact that there are plenty widely-enjoyed foods that are vegan by default and lots of great, filling meat-free foods suitable for different flavors of vegetarian. That being the case, I certainly can’t understand behavior like this:
When Patrick Moore, a salesman from Attleboro, Mass., arrived at an old friend’s wedding in 1999 to discover nothing but vegetarian options, he made an excuse about leaving the gift in his car so he could visit a sandwich shop across the street.
It was Moore’s prerogative, I guess, to go and fulfill his craving for a chicken parm, but he couldn’t wait until the wedding was over? It strikes me as rather rude to not only leave a wedding reception to go pick up food you like – really, there was nothing on the vegetarian menu he cared for? – but then to bring it back inside with you instead of scarfing it down at the shop… Classy! Maybe he could have grabbed a 40 oz. and brought that back, too, just in case the bar ran out of his favorite beer.
Anyway, here are the five main reasons I think that vegans should put together wedding menus that appeal to them instead of serving food that they can’t even eat:
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