Manolo for the Brides

Once upon a time, men (and women!!) in a country on the eve of its birth laid down their lives to cast off the yoke of tyranny. In the present day, those of us who live in the grand ol’ U.S. of A. celebrate their sacrifice by setting off Chinese fireworks, drinking too much, and laughing our butts off at people dressed in red, white, and blue.

Not that there’s anything wrong with dressing in red, white, and blue. In fact, a smart nautically-inspired suit that makes one think that one might like to travel back in time to the 30s can look chic and sharp! Generally, however, I think I’d prefer to wear my reds, whites, and blues separately or in groupings of two to avoid any erroneous implications. I say think because my everyday uniform is black on black with a little touch of black.

For those who can pull off color or the lack of it without looking like some crazed she-beast, here are three luscious frocks — two from Nicole Miller and one from Vera Wang — that could conceivable be used to send a message like “I love America” or “Why settle for something from David’s Bridal” or “Hey, I’m not afraid to grab two friends and make a spectacle of myself on a patriotic parade float.”

Looking at this gown lineup, I can even imagine some bride-to-be who loves her country very much dressing her bridesmaids in red and blue…hey, I said I could picture it in my head, not that I would actually suggest someone actually do that.

Happy Fourth!

Pnina Tornai is an Israeli designer with a flair for over-the-top bridal fashion. She eschews both convention and proofreaders — the best sentence on her site has to be “In the last to years Pnina has expended herself over seas.” Is there anything left? Let’s have a look!

I, too, would adopt a sullen expression if I were forced to walk a runway with a bouquet of dahlias affixed to my skull. A similar bunch of blooms appears to be sprouting from the model’s right shoulder.

(more…)

It’s been said that the reason most people love to watch acrobatics soar through the air is that they’re hoping to see at least one tights-clad performer go splat. If that’s true, it would explain the glee I feel when looking at some of the dresses in Vera Wang’s spring 2009 collection.

Oh, some of the frocks are lovely — this one, for example, is beautiful but rather boring — but many are absolutely horrid. Most, however, would look right at home in an episode of classic Star Trek. I’m looking at this one, in particular.

Now this gown covers the midsection with a big ol’ scrunched up mess of fabric, and if there’s anything ladies like, it’s embellishments that emphasize (and add girth to) their midsections. Wait, I have that backward — that’s precisely what 99.9% of brides-to-be DON’T like. But maybe I’m being too hash… Is this dress in the process of spawning? Is that how new gowns come into the world? Ah, the miracle of life!

(more…)

All right, I’ll admit it. I love saying “Swati Argade.” While I have no idea how one ought to say it, I’ve certainly enjoyed trying out different permutations of the Indian-American clothing designer and entrepreneur’s name.

Let me preface this edition of LOVE/HATE by saying that these designs are something like two years old. I can’t be sure they’re still out there. Basically, I enjoy saying (and reading) the names “Swati” and “Argade” so much that I found myself compelled to ignore the age of these designs.

Besides, it’s wedding season, and those people who have been invited to attend said weddings are frequently looking for a little inspiration. I know this because these lucky — depending on how you look at it — individuals often reach out to me to ask what they should wear to a wedding taking place in such-and-such a location at such-and-such a time.

I’ll spare you any further blathering on my part and simply say that I LOVE these two exteremely versatile outfits. Were I to see them on a duo of fellow guests at a wedding I was enjoying, I’d have to corner the chicks in the ladies room to ask where they purchased their clothes. In fact, considering what I do for a living, I’d probably gush so long and so hard that they’d begin to fear for their personal safety.

This, on the other hand…well, it…how about I just point out that every designer will have her hits and have her misses? It’s HATE all the way.

Honestly, I cannot even begin to describe what is going on here. It’s like someone tookthree or four unrelated pieces of clothes and, much like Dr. Frankenstein, used some form of unholy science to merge them into one schizophrenic outfit.

What say you?

I got all excited as I was preparing for this post because, hey, it’s finally Thursday and that means it’s time for LOVE/HATE and I have a picture of an uber gorgeous short dress that I’ve been sitting on for weeks now! At least I thought it was so gorgeous as to be beyond reproach.

Maybe I just wanted to love it so badly that my mind played seamstress?

You see, this dress has so much going for it: It hails from the gray matter of Ramona Keveza, who I utterly adore. It’s short, and I like when bride’s switch it up with something abbreviated. Plus, it’s sort of ruffly but not too ruffly, if you know what I mean.

And yet I just can’t shake this weird feeling that if the camera angle was just a tad different, we’d all come face to face with the model’s right nipple. I mean, where exactly do bosoms go in a dress like that? Once they get to wherever they’re supposed to go, are they in danger of falling out during bouts of serious boogying?

In conclusion, there’s a part of me that does love this dress, along with its more colorful cousin. There is, however, an even bigger part of me — a part that measures in at 36DD — that hates this dress and all dresses like it for being a forever unattainable ideal.

FYI: My book, iDo: Planning Your Wedding with Nothing But ‘Net (Paperback) is arriving on people’s doorsteps! This is neat both because it is happening slightly ahead of the June 10 schedule and because, duh, it’s my first book! I’m just a tad excited, and I do hope you’ll check it out…whether that means buying it or asking for it at your local library.

We’ve talked about weddingish regrets more than a few times here at MftB, and it truly is a bittersweet exercise. On one hand, it’s fun to keep looking at favors and frocks and flowers when one has no reason to buy them. On the other hand, it can make one question decisions already made…choices that can’t be taken back.

Now, when I start thinking “oh I wish I’d done/bought/used such-and-such a thing” I just plan a fabulous house party that incorporates all those products and ideas. Favors aren’t just for kiddie birthdays and weddings. Brides don’t have a monopoly on fresh blooms. And there’s no reason not to dress to the nines if you feel comfortable in a gown…the trick is learning to feel comfortable in a gown when everyone else is wearing slacks. Master that, and you’re golden!

The number one thing I wish I’d known about would have to be Bluefly. I didn’t start seriously thinking of this shop to end all shops as a source for reasonably priced, re-wearable bridesmaids’ garb until after I’d had a pickle of a time badgering my own ‘maids into picking something, anything, because we’re really getting down to the wire, here. Maybe telling them to go to Bluefly would have made everything easier for everyone…then again, probably not.

(more…)

You know what is truly fantastic? Ill tell you: When I come across a designer’s web page that doesn’t use all manner of Flash, so I can actually pull some images without having to resort to PrtScn–>Paint–>The Gimp. Jesus Peiro, I thank you for your use of plain old jpegs!

Damn, that is just gorgeous — perfect for those looking for a little shoulder and décolletage coverage. I usually like a little more flare in the hips, but if you’ve got kind of a flat tummy (or some super foundation garments) why ruin a good straight line? I think the classic simplicity is what I love best.

(more…)

I’m a huge fan of stepping away from the bridal salons when it comes time to choose dresses for your bridesmaids. For one thing, your gals can take all of the money they would have spent on “something they could wear again but won’t” and spend it on a dress that doesn’t scream bridesmaid. Of course, hitting up Bluefly instead of Eden Bridals is no guarantee that you’ll find something great.

Remember the bubble boob bow number I wrote about a few months back? As it turns out, that frock did not represent an isolated case of boobowocity. While trolling for potential bridesmaids’ dresses I came across more boob bows, which I have arranged here from the most minuscule to the most tuggable.

But why stop there? If you really want to drive home the point — Bows! You love ‘em! You’ve got ‘em! BOWS BOWS BOWS! — you can gift your gals with one of these Franchi clutches to thank them for dutifully encasing their bosoms in gigantic bows without complaint.

I wore a rather heavy gown during my stint as a bride and I was comfortable outdoors on a May day in Florida. I do admit that it was an extremely blustery Saturday, which kept things just cool enough for comfort. I could have gone with something lighter and airier, but I just love heavy, full, princessy gowns and there were plenty out there to be had.

When I was shopping for the perfect dress, I found myself faced with a great many extremes. There were the heavy, multi-layered formal frocks guaranteed to keep your legs warm even if your upper body is freezing. And there were the sexy, slinky sheaths that would have highlighted my “lady lumps” in the worst possible way. What was lacking was that “something in between” that would be princessy enough to tickle my particular fancy yet light enough to be wearable in a variety of weather conditions.

That’s why I’m in love with Chris Kole’s collection, The Cotton Bride. No, the gowns are not all cotton — in fact, most are linen, and some are silk — but they are all natural, hand-sewn, made to order, and designed to be comfortable. The best part is that prices start at $1,800, which is high-ish but not unusually expensive for a piece of clothing with the word “wedding” in its descriptor.

I do feel like these dresses take some getting used to…they’re not particularly shiny and we tend to associate shine with formality. My personal favorite, in case you were wondering, is the dress in the middle. How about you: would you eschew bridal satin in favor of cotton or linen?