Manolo for the Brides

Chances are that every wedding you’ve been to has included some sort of bridal party. Bridesmaids, groomsmen, a flower girl and/or ring bearer…these are common. In fact, I would bet good money that at least a hefty percentage of our readers have been in weddings where they were not the ones getting married. For my part, I’ve been a bridesmaid twice, maid of honor once, and once I got grabbed at the last minute to attend the bride at a spur-of-the-moment vow reaffirmation.

But now that you’re getting married, you need to decide whom to ask to attend you and in what capacity. That’s where things can get tricky. You may not really know what jobs there are, what sort of person is best suited to said job, or even whether you want these roles filled at all. The fact is that while you will need witnesses for legal purposes (anywhere from one to three people, depending on state law if you’re in the US), those people are not required to hold particular titles or wear matching clothes…but most of us do have those witnesses or other close friends and family members stand by our sides.

Fear not! Here’s a brief rundown of bridal attendants, common and un, in a typical western-style wedding. Read on to get a better idea of what your options are and how to best meet your needs in putting together a bridal party.

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I love gold wedding gowns, but I’m biased, having worn a gold gown myself. Tradition aside, I just couldn’t see myself wearing a white or ivory or cream dress. I’m naturally pale, so most of the whites I’ve encountered in my lifetime match my skin tone just a little too closely for comfort. Gold, on the other hand, made me look and feel all glowy and angelic.

Here we have a metallic-blend French taffeta wedding gown in a beautiful light gold. Roses and beaded re-embroidered Alençon lace accent the bodice and embellish the two-tiered bubble skirt with its chapel train. Finally, the lace adorning the bodice is heavily beaded with Swarovski crystals.

I think I’d really like (maybe even love) this gown if the roses and Swarovski crystals and hangy beady thingies all went bye-bye. I like the overall shape of the bodice and it’s looking like I have finally found a bubble skirt I can appreciate. But as it exists now, this wedding gown is way too busy for my particular tastes, so I’m leaning toward hate… or at the very least, active dislike. The model seems to dislike it as well.

What say you?

Photographer Tatiana Morozova snapped this photo of a gown with some serious identity issues.

Putting aside for the moment the fact that only brides born without nipples can reasonably wear this wedding dress, what is up with the belt? And that skirt… I could take it if the ruffles went all the way around or the entirety of it was lace. Overall, the combo of the belt, the ruffles, the lace, and yes, the see-through top leave me wondering just where I ought to look.

A woman I know loosely through another web site — one Diana Heideman — recently contributed a poem to that web site, and I was so enamored with it that I asked her if I could post it here in its entirety. She said yes, and I thought that the day before Thanksgiving would be the perfect time to take a break from all the wedding invitations and ceremony accessories and bridal bouquets.

Here is her poem, entitled “14 Sentences On Goodwill Wedding Dresses”:

Strapless, vanity size 0, from David’s Bridal, never worn with original tags.
She never lost the 50 pounds she swore she would, and bought the proper size the week before the wedding, and looked beautiful.

Eggshell sheath with sash, tags removed, altered, never worn.
Two months before the wedding, after the final fitting, her pregnancy test came back positive, and while she still fit in the dress, he did not want to be a father, and one morning he was gone.

Princess dress, beaded, some beads missing, carefully mended tears, light soiling on the hem.
Years after their mother’s wedding, three sisters each in turn played bride, or princess, dancing around in mama’s dress, but all three girls are grown now.

Vintage dress with intricate beading, carefully hand sewn from a pattern, worn once, musty but clean.
Her children and their children were too busy fighting over jewelry and furniture to notice her real treasures, and got rid of anything they couldn’t put a price on.

Tasteful silk tea-length dress, clearly worn, some wrinkles and snags in the fabric.
The dress was stuffed in the back of her closet after six years, two children, and one misplaced phone call that revealed his cheating, since she couldn’t bear the reminder of better times.

White satin dress with train, worn once, pristine condition.
The wedding and the marriage have been perfect, but she feels it criminal to put the dress away where it will never be worn again, so she offers someone else a sliver of the joy she has.

Traditional off-the-shelf classic gown, worn once, cared for well.
Always pragmatic and less than sentimental, after her only child–a son–was in college and she hit menopause, she saw no reason to keep a dress her family would never use again.

It’s rather bittersweet, no? But the overwhelming theme that runs throughout — that memories can and should be passed on, for better or for worse — is fascinating. Not many brides opt for second hand wedding dresses, but those who do are inadvertently sharing a rich history with someone they will likely never meet.

I gave my wedding gown to my paternal grandmother’s church so she or someone else from that institution could make sure it was passed on to a bride-to-be who both needed it and would enjoy it. I’ll probably never find out what happened to my dress, but I hope it went to someone whose marriage has been as happy as my own.

(photo via)

It’s time for a guessing game.

I want to know how much you think this open backed, sized-to-order silk chiffon wedding dress costs. It could be $5,000…it could be $500. I don’t have a lot of details other than that it is available in white or black, it’s tight fitting, and it comes with a short bustle, though I do know how much it costs. If you can’t even begin to guess how much the above wedding dress costs, answer me this: How much do you think is should cost?

(the answer — no peeking!)

Brides.com has a sweet new feature called Sketch to Dress, where wedding gown designers’ sketches and the end result of their work are posted side by side. Right now, there aren’t many wedding dresses posted, but I’m really hoping they add more in the future because it’s fascinating to see how the design evolves as it goes from lines on paper to cloth draped on a living body.

Sometimes I like the drawing better, and sometimes I much prefer the wedding dress itself. I’d be interested to hear your take on it — do you ever find that the finished product is disappointing when compared to the sketch?

In this case, the Peter Langner wedding gown is much more flattering “in the flesh”…though this may have something to do with the fact that the model in the sketch is apparently one of the fish people from the planet Aqualon.

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(I heartily apologize to those whose comments were erroneously deleted — please feel free to repost!)

All right, I don’t think I have to tell you that it’s a no-no to call up your guests to (ahem) remind them that ties and heels are de rigueur. Nor do I have to remind you that while you can give your FMIL wardrobe suggestions, you cannot choose her wedding day outfit for her. Heck, these days, many brides-to-be are even giving their attendants plenty of leeway when it comes to what to wear!

That said, there’s nothing wrong with obliquely pointing wedding guests in the right direction, especially if many of them have never been to your reception venue and don’t have a contact in the wedding party to press for more info. So what’s the easiest way to tell guests what to wear? Simple — choose telling wedding invitations, like these from Two Paperdolls.

This invitation is a twist on the classic ecru one-sheeter with pearly ink, so I’d choose an updated take on the forever chic little (color) dress. The chosen fonts range from serious to fanciful, which suggests this wedding will be more formal than not. If I was unsure, I’d choose accessories I could shed easily, like kid gloves or a big sparkly necklace.

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We here at Manolo for the Brides tend to err in favor of moderation because we know that our readers hail from a variety of economic spectra. Of course, just because one’s wedding budget is $2,000 does not mean that one can’t admire and even drool over wedding gowns, wedding rings, and wedding cakes that cost ten or fifty times that amount. And speaking of over-the-top wedding cake, the always lovely Sarah sent me a slide show of Kuwaiti wedding cakes created by Omar from the Opera Cafe in Kuwait.

If you’ve ever dreamed of cutting into a wedding cake taller than the many of your guests, look no further. Sarah passed along thirty-two images of amazing wedding cakes…cakes that light up, cakes that are working fountains, cakes that look like they’re about to fall over, and cakes that look nothing like cake. I chose a selection to post here, and you can see more under the cut.

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Want to see bridal models with good posture, normal stances, and happy faces? You may have to get knocked up first. It’s not that every maternity wedding dress designer uses smiling models — the models at Sarah Houston are scowling at me in their pretty frocks as I type this — but your chances of seeing a grin or two go way up when you’re looking at maternity gowns.

Just look how happy this model is in her Bjorn & Me dresses in (from left to right) chiffon with handsewn beading, satin embellished with Italian lace, and matte satin with French lace. Who knows if she’s actually pregnant…I’m not seeing much evidence of a bump under all that fabric. It’s just so nice to see a model who actually has a smile on her face! And besides that, I just happen to like these wedding gowns.