Manolo for the Brides

Oh, I always knew Betsey Johnson was off her rocker. Shoes with earrings? Come on! But while I can almost imagine a situation in which one might choose to wear a yellow prairie dress with a dropped hoop paired with a black bowler hat a la her Spring 2009 ready-to-wear collection, I simply cannot envision the bride who would opt for either of these.

If, however, either of the above frocks is your dream dress, I advise you to browse Amazon, where you can find a similar (if slightly more modest) piece of clothing for a mere $34.95.

Start talking about weddings, and chances are pretty much everyone gets the same initial image: a woman in a big white gown with a veil on her head.

Of course, you will be wearing something (unless you are having a full-fledged naturist ceremony), but what is actually necessary? What’s optional? What do you really have to wear on your wedding day?

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When I was but a wee lass — this was in the 80s — Barbie wore clothing that looked nothing like the clothing I saw on your average adult. Heck, her clothes were brighter, quirkier, and more frilly than anything I ever saw on a model, rock star, or cartoon character. I don’t think I have to tell you how badly I wanted kid-sized versions of Barbie’s wardrobe.

I guess my tastes haven’t changed all that much, because I think this might be my new favorite wedding dress:

The bride is one Princess Lasertron, aka Megan, aka the maker of fine felt flowers and other cool stuff. Her fabulous custom dress was created by Joi Mahon of Dress Forms Design, a private design studio in Sioux City, Iowa. And the photographs (see more here) were taken by the talented Becky Novacek.

While this dress isn’t exactly wedding-y, I think it’s divine!

Oh, one more unrelated thing! Go have a look at the WaPo article that Jennie linked to in the comments of this post. How do you pull of a sane, stuff-free wedding on public property where weddings are verboten? Read the article to find out!

In the past commenters have been forthright about expressing their dislike of black bridesmaid dresses. Some don’t care for them because they say black is a boring choice, while others think black should be banned because they feel black and weddings just don’t mix. That’s why I’m so curious to find out what y’all think of black on brides.

This gown from the Bella collection of Dagnez – a custom dressmaker located in Poland. Unlike many Dagnez creations, this one is currently available for sale for $2419.99 from Splendid Gowns. They describe it thusly:

Fabulous evening dress for every woman who wants to feel unique. Made of poliester with several types and designs of silk fabric combined into a stylish creation, irregular hem and flounces which give it a modern character with a tint of melancholy. Flouncing skirt with stiffening underdress +tied bodice with irregular vest.

Personally, I love this gown, and I’m a big fan of brides who choose black. I’m not saying I’d wear this gown or even a black wedding dress, but I can picture some tough, self-assured bride bringing down the house in it. There will always be some who cluck their tongues at those brides who know what they want and what they want is to wear black, but there will always some who cluck their tongues at brides who serve vegan fare or don’t wear veils or choose sneakers over pumps. Who cares about the cluckers, I say!

Now, what say you?

In some traditions, a bride wears several outfits over the course of the wedding. In India the bride is expected to wear a different outfit for each of several different parties over the course of multiple days. In China, during the wedding day a bride may change her clothes as many as eight times.

In the west, though, if the bride changed clothes it was usually for the now rarely seen going away outfit, which she would wear to travel on the first leg of her honeymoon.

Over the last few years, though, a new trend has emerged: the reception gown.

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The amazing A.J. (yes, that A.J.) writes:

I think I’m finally ready to sell my wedding dress. I think. I don’t feel a need to clutter up stuff with a dress I’ll never wear again. And I highly doubt my daughter(s) would want to wear it. It’ll probably be very out of style by then…

So I was wondering, what is the best way to sell my dress? Is Craigslist fine, or would a consignment shop have a better return? What is a proper price to ask for it? I was thinking half of what I paid, not counting alterations and cleaning. Is that too much? Anything else I should consider?

Great question! I was lucky in that I had a vehicle through which I could safely donate my dress on short notice — the family church — which meant I didn’t have to haul it all the way from Florida to Mass or worry about selling it. I just took it off after the reception ended and left it on my gram’s couch for her to deal with. I’ll probably never find out who it went to (the whole left-hand, right-hand thing) but I can be sure it went to someone who really needed it.

But getting back to the question at hand…there are so many ways to sell one’s dress nowadays. Once upon a time, Craigslist, eBay, neighborhood consignment shops, and the local classifieds would have been your only options, but in recent years, a bunch of interesting bridal consignment web sites have sprung up. These include:

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I love that inspiration can come from anywhere, anything, or anyone. Just yesterday, The Beard and I were at one of our local beaches, swimming, soaking up the sun, and looking for beach glass. Amid the sea junk, The Beard found a mussel shell that was a vivid blue outside and a beautiful silver on the inside. After inspecting it for a bit, he said — and I was so damn proud at that moment — “Wouldn’t these make great wedding colors?”

To The Beard I say, “Here you are, my dear.”

Moving clockwise-ish from the top left, there is a Nicole Miller stretch taffeta dress, the Amaya pump from LAUREN by Ralph Lauren, a blue chalcedony sterling silver ring from Overstock.com, an invitation from Leigh’s Wishing Well, a JS Boutique cutaway shoulder gown, a hydrangea centerpiece, a deep blue aisle runner, and a hydrangea bouquet.

A lovely combo, yes?

When I need a red gown fix, I usually head on over to the Offbeat Bride blog, where stunning, juicy, overwhelmingly gorgeous red gowns can be found in abundance. The one thing I haven’t seen until now — there or anywhere for that matter — is a saucy red maternity wedding gown.

Hey, why not? The stigma formerly attached to brides with buns has all but disappeared, thanks to all the well-known (and not so well-known) personages who decided to mix it up by having babies before tying the knot or getting hitched while very obviously knocked up. I have friends who scheduled the mommy and matrimony milestones at different stages of their lives for various reasons, including convenience, career, and even the lack of a present partner. It’s no one’s business but their own.

Personally, I LOVE this satin and chiffon dress, if only because it’s not desperately trying to be a non-maternity gown like so many maternity wedding gowns do. Come on — we can see your bump under all those gauzy layers! When you’re fit to pop, you may as well rock your delicate condition. To me, this gown says, “Hey, I’m pregnant, and if you have a problem with that you can just put down your damn cake and go the hell home.”

What say you?

I do hope that Sandy Ouellette, owner of Desired Weddings*, will forgive me for using her wonderful photograph. Ouellette wrote that the wedding pictured above was the most exciting wedding she’d ever attended, which I can’t say I find particularly surprising. You simply have to expect the unexpected when the blushing bride is 101 years old and the dashing groom is a young 106.

For the reception, the groom changed into his prison wear because, he said “Now I really have a ball and chain.”

When you’re almost a decade past the century mark, you can get away with almost anything!

*Desired Weddings is worth a look if you’re a plus-sized bride-to-be and in the Putnam, CT area. Ouellette knows what it’s like to walk into a bridal salon and feel out of place. In her personal message on the shop’s web site, she writes: “Did you know that the average size today is 14 and above? Yet, how often have you walked into a bridal shop and couldn’t try on a dress because they didn’t have your size or anything close to it?”