Manolo for the Brides

The classic tuxedo for grooms can be described many ways. Subdued, serious, masculine, black, perhaps white… or not. Tuxedos come in many colors, from purple to red to green to blue. The colored tuxedo is an unusual choice and perhaps not the best one.

Note that the tuxedo pictured above — from Band Of Outsiders, Inc. — is not representative of all colored tuxedos. And of course, as in this photo, a too-short jacket and too-short pants will make you look like an ass no matter what color your tuxedo is. Oh, and if you do go for a colored tux, choose your cut and hue very carefully lest you end up looking like a pimp or a waiter or a member of a barber shop quartet or one of those fellows who wear fezzes and drive around in tiny little cars.

I’m leaning toward hate on this one, except in the case of the quirkiest, most outrageous weddings. To put it another way, a colored tuxedo could be amazing at the right wedding. A wedding that goes all the way and then some, maybe. But at a traditional wedding? No, thanks!

What say you?

I was reading about the 20 weirdest Craigslist postings when I came across this unusual want ad:

So, my fiancee and I are getting married in June. He has 8 groomsmen lined up and I only have one bridesmaid. So, I need some girls who are attractive and around my age to stand up in my wedding. You can be single or taken. It doesn’t matter….you just have to be hot. But, not hotter then me. Email me for more information. The wedding will be in Madison and you won’t have to pay for a thing.

Gee, I wonder if the whole “you just have to be hot. But, not hotter then me” thing has anything to do with this bride not having enough friends to fill out her bridal party? That aside, it’s easy to see why a bride would automatically feel the need to find extra girlfriends or guyfriends to ensure wedding attendant symmetry. At almost every wedding I’ve attended (and I’ve been to quite a few) there were an equal number of guys and gals on either side of the officiant.

But just because that’s the usual way of doing things doesn’t mean it’s the only way of doing things. Sometimes the groom has groomsmaids and the bride has bridesmen, or both sides are entirely mixed. Sometimes brides and grooms have no attendants standing with them at all. And occasionally, a wedding party is made up of lots and lots of bridesmaids (or groomsmen) and just a few groomsmen (or bridesmaids).

When you’re facing bridesmaid/groomsman inequity, the processional and recessional are the trickiest things to coordinate… and it’s not even that tricky! You can have all the men wait at the altar with the groom and let all the ladies walk the aisle solo. Everyone can walk solo, if you prefer. When there are two men to every woman (or vice versa), you can double up as long as your aisle is wide enough for three. You can also have some groups of three, some doubles, and some people walking solo, as necessary. Or, heck, you might just have everyone run out crazy-style all at once. Anything goes, provided your ceremony location or house of worship is okay with your decision.

But if you share the OP’s conundrum and are mainly worried about how your wedding photos will look, my advice is chill. There’s no law stating that you have to line everyone up on either side of the bride and groom in your pictures. Group up like the huge wedding party in the above wedding pic and the difference in numbers between the bride’s attendants and the groom’s attendants will be a lot less obvious.

Image via

On the morning of my wedding, my stylist looked me straight in the eye and said “Honey, a glass of champagne and a bite of a muffin do not breakfast make.” Guests have it so easy, sitting there in pews or folding chairs while the bride, groom, and their attendants stand stock still in dress shoes for the duration of the wedding ceremony.

Unless, that is, they fall over, like this groomsman, who probably did not have any breakfast. The temptation to skip the pre-wedding meal is always there… think of the bride or bridesmaid who wants to avoid a foodbaby or the groom or groomsman who is in too much of a rush to grab a bite. Unfortunately, some of us do not handle low blood sugar as well as others, and a fainting bridal party, while occasionally humorous, does not make for picturesque ceremony photos.

Brides and grooms, do yourselves a favor and bring a little snack with you to wherever it is you’re getting dressed and prepped for the wedding ceremony. Remind your bridesmaids and groomsmen that it’ll be a while before the reception meal is served, especially if you’re taking wedding photographs after the ceremony. Better yet, equip the bridal (and, uh, groomal?) chamber with a fruit plate or a platter of bagels for everyone, including your stylist, to nosh on while ties are tied and makeup is applied.

I have to ask: Have you seen The Plunge? Yet another wedding planning site for grooms has emerged, and this one is pretty flashy compared to its peers. Unlike most wedding sites geared toward dudes, this one has actual written content that goes beyond a hundred incarnations of “Stand back, and shut up.” Then again, a lot of that content reads like this:

There’s a new piece of furniture in your bedroom: a stack of magazines, books, and articles that could double as a side-table. It’s your fiancée’s “wedding porn.” And unlike actual porn, this isn’t harmless. It’s putting ideas in her head. Poisonous ideas. Thoughts about how you, as a groom, should be “behaving.” This is where it gets dangerous.

A few things irk me about this snippet from one of The Plunge’s intro pages. First, I don’t buy into the idea that the WIC can turn regular chicks into screaming harpies. A true bridezilla was probably already kind of a bitch, and no magazine or book is going to turn a regular chick into a bitch. Second, it stands to reason that there are behavioral (and dress and etiquette) guidelines for weddings, the same way there are behavior guidelines for any party. It’s a formal function, jeez. If it’s mantime to complain about wedding planning, can we at least get some fresh and original complaints?

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Reader mkb is one of the few males who comments here at Manolo for the Brides, so it’s no surprise that it was he who informed me that Cyberoptix Tie Lab offers a 10-20% bulk discount on wedding ties for guys. Or gals, gal-ish guys, guy-ish gals, or anything in between, for that matter… like if you’re dressing a groomsmaid or best woman in dude’s duds or planning a wedding that falls somewhere on the LGBT spectrum. They even stock a selection of slender ties meant to look good on thinner, smaller frames.

Grooms can choose from any of the styles of tie on the Cyberoptix Tie Lab web site, but I’d recommend browsing their color selection first, as the company has a flickr page featuring its usual tie palettes. Don’t see any that float your boat? No prob. With enough lead time — think just two to three weeks, wow — they can usually find ties that will match your wedding color scheme.

And before I sign off, I wanted to let you know about the WEtv.com Ugliest Bridesmaid Dress photo contest ending on April 13.

Ever been forced down the aisle in a bubblegum pink bridesmaid dress with over-the-top tulle and big, poofy sleeves? Are you a former bride who made your bridesmaids wear a wild dress, but now regret your decision? Now’s the chance to show us your ugly dress! One day of embarrassment could earn you $5,000! Upload your picture today!

All you need to do is register at the site linked above and post a picture of you wearing that uncool bridesmaid frock. The winner will be determined by votes cast by a panel of contest sponsor employees, so don’t be put off by the Hot-or-Not style interface asking viewers to rate bridesmaid dresses on a scale of “pretty ugly” to “totally ugly.”

Chances are that every wedding you’ve been to has included some sort of bridal party. Bridesmaids, groomsmen, a flower girl and/or ring bearer…these are common. In fact, I would bet good money that at least a hefty percentage of our readers have been in weddings where they were not the ones getting married. For my part, I’ve been a bridesmaid twice, maid of honor once, and once I got grabbed at the last minute to attend the bride at a spur-of-the-moment vow reaffirmation.

But now that you’re getting married, you need to decide whom to ask to attend you and in what capacity. That’s where things can get tricky. You may not really know what jobs there are, what sort of person is best suited to said job, or even whether you want these roles filled at all. The fact is that while you will need witnesses for legal purposes (anywhere from one to three people, depending on state law if you’re in the US), those people are not required to hold particular titles or wear matching clothes…but most of us do have those witnesses or other close friends and family members stand by our sides.

Fear not! Here’s a brief rundown of bridal attendants, common and un, in a typical western-style wedding. Read on to get a better idea of what your options are and how to best meet your needs in putting together a bridal party.

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This post in honor of De’s best friend, whose groom vetoed her bridal Chucks idea. After reading De’s comment, I couldn’t stop myself from finding pics of wedding parties who opted to wear Converse over dress shoes. I’m not saying that I’m pro bridal sneakers — especially when they’re the platform kind that look like they’ve contracted a plague of rhinestones — but I count myself in the pro All Stars camp.

Seriously, how cute is this snapshot by photog Katy Regnier? From what I can tell, the bride was the only one cool enough for Converse…and purple ones, at that!

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No, not a lot of duct tape like that, you pervs. I mean there will probably be a lot of duct tape on the man registry* that will precede what some are calling the newest trend in weddings, the man shower. Googling “man showers” — see what I do for you? — brings up plenty of results, which could indeed point to a growing trend. EXCEPT that almost all of the results lead to a single AP article reprinted in papers across the U.S.

The gift-laden dude you see above is Brian Wigand, whose FFIL Jonathan Morris welcomed him into the family by throwing him a man shower as a warm up to, not a substitute for, the traditional bachelor party.

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