Every few years, bows make a comeback. Sometimes it’s on gowns for brides, sometimes it’s on frocks for bridesmaids, but like clockwork, the bows always find their way into this or that season’s dresses as if they haven’t already been done to death. And just recently a little birdie whispered in my ear that the 2012 wedding dress trends included, you guessed it, bows. I have a funny fascination with bows that began the first time I saw a giant bow placed smack dab on a bust as if the breasts concealed underneath were a gift waiting to be unwrapped. Very naughty, really.

Want to see some of the 2012 bows? (And where they’ve ended up this go around, which includes the entirety of the torso and back, waist and bust, sometimes turned completely to the side.) Your wish is my command!

Spring 2012 by Douglas Hannant

Spring 2012 by Vera Wang

Spring 2012 by Tara Keely

Spring 2012 by Alan Hannah

Aaaand another example of classic Vera (along with the classic Vera model)

What do you think? Bows, yes or omigosh no?

No tears here!

A while back I asked all of your lovely ladies and gents which of you cried at your weddings or anticipated crying at your weddings, and the results were pretty interesting. 61% of the unmarried set thought they’d cry, while 63% of people who were actually married DID NOT actually cry. So it seems that a lot of us think we’re going to cry while we say our vows, but not all that many of us actually do.

Me? I laughed. At my own inability to read the bit of paper that held my vows. Oops! And I’ve seen plenty of brides and grooms do the same. I like to hear a little laughter during the wedding vows – it certainly makes things more interesting for guests. And in the spirit of my love of laughter during wedding ceremonies, I’m putting up a new poll modeled after the crying at weddings survey.

For those not yet married:

For those already married:

Don’t see yourself laughing during wedding vows because it’s so solemn an occasion? Maybe you won’t laugh, but don’t discount the possibility! As solemn as you may think you’ll be feeling, a case of the giggles can come on without warning. So former brides and grooms, if you were a laugher, I’d love to know what made you laugh!

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As more couples pay for all or part of their own weddings, changes are happening in the way ceremonies and receptions are planned. My favorite change? The emergence of the involved, helpful groom who has an opinion about his upcoming wedding and is exciting to shoulder his share of the wedding planning work. In my dad’s day – as I’ve been led to believe – grooms mainly tried to stay out of the way of brides who had the final say when it came to just about everything. But now that grooms are footing some of the bill? They’re folding invitations that they helped pick out, assembling favors that they actually like, and more.

Let's hear it for those helpful grooms!

Some of these involved grooms-to-be are even blogging, though admittedly they tend to give it up after they tie the knot unlike some people – hello! – who just keep on going on about wedding planning like nothing happened. There are even wedding planning guides for grooms! Unfortunately, some parts of the wedding industry have yet to catch up to the trend of the helpful groom and continue to focus only on brides-to-be and their desires. I’ve even heard stories of wedding vendors who, when meeting hetero couples, talked only to the bride and all but ignored the presence of a groom. Uncool, vendors, uncool. Was The Beard as involved as he could have been? I plead the fifth on that one and state for the record that I can be a a force of nature when it comes to party planning.

How about you? Is your other half – if your other half happens to be a groom – pulling his weight? If not, and you want him to (some brides don’t), then TELL HIM THAT. Don’t just stew in a sauce of resentment until you explode. Your groom, like many, may have been told by a well-meaning male relative that he shouldn’t participate in wedding planning. Inside many an uninvolved groom is a helpful groom waiting to come out.

Image: Peacock Photography

Hey everyone! It’s time once again to play Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness!

You all know how this works by now. I post a picture that’s simply weeping into a lace-trimmed hankie of doom for a caption. You provide said captions via the comments function. Next week, I declare a winner and we all rejoice.

Simple enough, no?

This week’s pic comes from the Oh For the Love of Grilled Cheese! file and looks a little like this:

Ready… set… snark!

Bridal veil alternatives? I’ve got your bridal veil alternatives right here, and today it’s a giant flower. Right on your head. Designed by Austie Eckley for SOCA, and custom made just for the bride who wants something a little different. Make that a big different, since admittedly, that’s not a dainty bloom.

Why you shouldn't put seeds in your ears?

And the view from behind...

Is it me? No. Is it the bridal veil alternative for every bride who wants something different? No. But I still love it. I think it’s fabulous. Wacky and strange and fabulous, just right for the bride who’s looking for a bridal headpiece that is going to stun and wow her guests. Would you dare to wear something this outrageous? If so, I want to give you a bridal high five!

A Jewish wedding tradition with a growing following

Am I the only one who likes seeing wedding traditions from one faith or heritage embraced by people from other backgrounds? I know that there are some people who don’t like the co-opting of wedding traditions by “outsiders” but I my take is that wedding traditions wouldn’t have become traditions if brides and grooms didn’t find value in them. It’s not for me to say that so-and-so can’t do X, Y, and Z because those practices belong to another culture. Take the ketubah, a traditional and beautiful element of the Jewish wedding and marriage. According to a recent New York Times piece, more non-religious and Christian couples are embracing the ketubah in their own weddings.

“We wanted a permanent reminder of the covenant we made with God,” Mrs. Austin said. “We see this document superseding the marriage license of a state or a court.”

Such sentiments have been reshaping the market for ketubot (the plural in Hebrew) in the past decade. Michael Shapiro, an observant Jew from Toronto who sells artistic ketubot through the Web site ketubah.com, said he had seen the non-Jewish share of his customers rise from zero to about 10 percent. He is forming a spinoff site, artvows.com, that concentrates on non-Jewish consumers.

The decade of non-Jews discovering the ketubah coincides with three relevant social trends: the rise of Christian Zionism, the growth of interfaith marriage, and the mainstreaming of the New Age movement with its search for spirituality in multiple faith traditions. As a result, an increasing number of gentiles have taken up Judaic practices: holding a Passover Seder, eating kosher food and studying kabbalah, the Jewish mystical movement.

What began as way to protect the bride’s interests in the event of a divorce and morphed into a beautiful and artful representation of specific contractural provisions for marriage had a resurgence of popularity in the 1960s Jewish counterculture. Suddenly the ketubah was back and once again something to display rather than something to be hidden away. And, like I said, the ketubah is now finding its way into non-Jewish weddings and onto non-Jewish walls. I’m cool with that – in fact, I think it’s very cool, especially for those Christians who want to give a nod to their religion’s Jewish roots.

How does it strike you, this flow of wedding traditions from one faith or background to another? Do you think it’s cool, or kind of weird and inauthentic?

Sometimes it’s the tiny touches that make a wedding beautiful – which is good news for those of us who can’t exactly fit the big luxuries into our budgets. What kind of tiny touches, you may be asking.

How about floral ice cubes? Which your wedding caterer may be able to provide. And aren’t that hard if you’re handling your own wedding catering. You can order edible flowers in bulk online, and floral ice cubes can make even simple things like water feel more luxurious.

Easy pretty touches for the DIY bride (or your caterer)

Or if flowers on ice aren’t your thing, consider spicing up your groom’s and groomsmen attire with floral ties for the guys. At one wedding, the groomsmen’s ties coordinated with the maid of honor’s dress, and the effect is really striking and fun.

Floral ties on the guys? Gorgeous!

Tiny touches can be anything, from mismatched, thrifted embroidered linens on your reception tables to something like puzzle place cards. What tiny touches will make your wedding extra beautiful?