Let’s clear this up once and for all

Seeing as that people have STRONG feelings about favors, I thought it would be fun to create a little poll so all the MftB fans out there can weigh in anonymously so we can finally find out what favors are indeed favored. If nothing else, your answers to the question below may help confused brides- and grooms-to-be who want to be sure of delighting (and avoid offending) their guests!

Feel free to mull it over for a while before answering. I’ve set it up so that this poll will be active for an entire year — if I remember, I’ll report the final results right here in a year’s time.

13 Responses to “Let’s clear this up once and for all”

  1. Jess says:

    Can we check off more than one of those? Cause some of them overlap. For example, I think the heart-shaped measuring spoons, while useful, are kinda dumb, but I think a picture frame, while decorative, is also useful. Personally, I feel as long as it’s not a total waste of material, it’s ok. If it’s tschocke, make sure it’s not expensive, so people don’t feel bad leaving it behind.

    I think my favorite ones are home-made gifts, like the jam we got at one wedding, and maple syrup we got at another. Thought (and lots of time) was put into it, it wasn’t just ordered online…like my favors for my wedding. (Which I would stand by any day, cause who doesn’t love to grow flowers? They all got taken home by someone, I didn’t have much left to grow my own!)

  2. Never teh Bride says:

    Good point about the overlap, Jess. I could have chosen that as a poll option but I wanted to get a general picture. I think it would have gotten too broad with multiple answers per pollee.

    And as an aside, I love the plantable favors. They sprout up so quickly and were really pretty!

  3. Melissa B. says:

    The one favor I’ve received that did not end up in the garbage can at my hotel room was a mix CD the couple made. They both have fantastic, quirky taste in music and I love playing it — it makes me think of them and smile.

    I’ve never received an edible favor, but I’d give those the thumbs up as well. Anything that doesn’t automatically go into the trash and create more waste is great in my book!

  4. Carol says:

    I’d rather have nothing, thanks. And not because the favors are “generally lame” but because we already have enough stuff in our house. Don’t need another set of measuring spoons or another picture frame. Don’t want cookies if your cake is good. Spend the money on more wine or an upgrade on the cake instead.

  5. Ellen says:

    This is an interesting question. Typically, in Jewish weddings there are no favors given out at all. We save that for the Bar Mitzvahs. Although, at weddings that I have been to I have thought that leaving a little gift or favor at each seat or the seat of the woman is really cute. Personally, the only useful favor I have gotten was a picture frame with my table number in it. Picture frames are always handy.

  6. Rabrab says:

    I’m with Carol for the most part.

    Favors aren’t necessarily lame (and many aren’t,) but I’m already fighting the Battle of the Stuff, and more stuff, no matter how well-meaning, isn’t something I need. If you want to do favors, do edible or plantable.

  7. Nariya says:

    Yeah, no stuff for me either, though my mom really wanted to do little silver bell ornaments for my wedding. They were pretty, so we went ahead. I’d rather “receive” something like an SPCA donation. Favors are nothing I’ll miss; I’d rather the money go to a good cause.

  8. satori says:

    The best wedding favor I’ve received was a beautiful cd of the bride and groom’s favorite songs. For the “liner notes”, they both spent time writing out the specific ways each song had to do with their relationship: the first song they called “their song”; their first dance; the song they listened to when they had to be apart; the song they played for the first dance at their wedding, etc. It was lovely, and it didn’t hurt that the music was awesome! I thought it was so beautiful and thoughtful, and it meant a lot more to me than cookies or a picture frame might have. Each cd was distributed along with a cute little minibottle of their favorite schnapps, so I suppose there was an “edible” involved, but long after the shot of schnapps was consumed I’m still listening to that cd.

  9. I don’t understand why the hosts would feel compelled to give gifts to guests after spending $100/plate on dinner and booze, but it’s their money.

    That said, the best favor I got was at my friend Ilene’s wedding. Her husband is in the cheese business. They had little cheddars made up with their names and the date of the wedding on it. My fiance and I spent fifteen minutes at the end of the reception looking for left-behind cheeses so we could have extra. (Yes, we are that shameless.)

  10. Leah says:

    Is it terribly gauche to leave a favor if you don’t want it/won’t use it?

  11. Leah,

    No, it’s not. It just means extra for the rest of us!

  12. Nony Mouse says:

    My take on it are the best favors are probably those you can take or leave, and can either be kept or re-gifted. If you have a set of heart shaped measuring spoons, do you need another? Who could you give an extra set to?
    Personally, I gave out kisses with stickers on the bottom. They could be eaten and tossed. I was on something of a budget, and figured that nobody would really feel let down if I went light on the favors, rather than the cake or refreshments.

  13. TeleriB says:

    Food. Especially if there is going to be an hour or more between the start of the reception and when the meal is served. Some people regularly eat supper at 4pm, others at 7pm; if the buffet isn’t open until 6:30, some edibles can keep those of us who are early eaters from cranky low blood sugar land.