In Spirit Showers?

Bridal showers are subject to all sorts of factors, from friends spread out around the country to delays caused by a complicated postal system to bridesmaids’ budget woes. Can your best friend afford to travel across two states twice — once for the shower and once for the wedding? Your favorite cousin didn’t receive her invite until two days before the event, oops. And air travel is just too much of a pain these days. Long story short, it would seem that tricky logistical problems are not at all uncommon, if the existence of Tutto Liccica is any indication.


Tutto Luccica specializes in remote (or, as they call them, “In spirit“) showers meant to transcend geographical differences. It works like this: Tutto Luccica helps the hostess pick a date and provides invitations, shower favors, and an event web site with information about the guest of honor. They then mail said GoH a centerpiece gift package that she is barred from opening until the specified date. I won’t go into that, but I can safely say it’s something you could easily put together yourself.

Finally, the hostess is given instructions that outline how to make it all work…instructions, I might add, that aren’t explained on Tutto Luccica’s web site. I can only assume that invitees are encouraged to send a gift that will arrive on or around a specified date, at which time they can use their powers of imagination to envision the bride-to-be happily unwrapping her bounty alone, in her jim-jams. Maybe it’s like the time I played Hour of Power with The Beard over IRC when I lived in NYC and he lived in Boston…

Does this seem a little weird to anyone else? In essence, you’re getting invited in spirit to a party that is only taking place in spirit, but you’re being asked to send a real gift. I’d be much more apt to send a gift to the bride-to-be if I were to receive an invitation to an actual bridal shower that circumstance kept me from attending. Am I just a stick in the mud who is not hip and with it enough to recognize the future of bridal showers?

Goodness me, I hope not.

6 Responses to “In Spirit Showers?”

  1. casablancabride says:

    That’s weird. Really weird. I guess it just goes to show that the wedding industry is even more full of ridiculous crap than we thought. 🙂

  2. blablover5 says:

    They should include a web cam and teleconferencing so then you can watch her open up the gift.

    Maybe even the option to tag everyone’s blogs.

  3. Twistie says:

    Wow, that’s just…perfectly creepy and wrong for Halloween.

    As much as distance plays a role in planning a wedding these days, I would feel very sorry for a bride who couldn’t come up with a handful of friends and relatives in her vicinity, should one of them choose to hold a shower for her.

    I had two bridesmaids (one of whom was my sister-in-law) who lived across the country from me, but there were still plenty of locals around so my MOH could throw me a physical shower with real guests who got to eat the refreshments, watch me open the gifts they’d so generously brought, and enjoy each others’ company, as well as mine.

    This just sounds kind of pathetic and icky.

    I know I would probably cry my eyes out if I were thrown a ‘shower’ like this. To me the bigger point is the fellowship, even though I enjoyed the presents very much. If I can’t have my friends there, I don’t want the ‘party.’

  4. MissPinkKate says:

    If I were invited to a real life shower, I might send a gift for a good friend or sibling (in fact, I did for my sister’s shower this weekend, which is in FL and I’m in NY), but a virtual shower? Eh, no.

  5. KES says:

    My fiance’s boss’s daughter got married this summer, and she was very far away from all family and friends until just before the wedding, so the night before she was given a “Shower in a Box” which was just a bunch of cards and well-wishes from those who would have liked to be at a shower for her if it had been given. I don’t know if there were any “real” gifts involved (maybe gift cards, but maybe not). I thought it was a sweet idea, but it was completely homemade and did NOT cost freaking $325. 😛

  6. blablover5: A truly technical shower would be virtual indeed. Perhaps instead of real presents, the bride-to-be would receive the “presents” one can send over Facebook?

    Twistie : Ditto. What confounds me is that there is no reason not to invite potential shower guests because they are far away. There’s always the chance they will make the trip, and the invitation itself sends the message that one’s presence would have been appreciated had circumstances allowed attendance! A real invitation furthermore does exactly what these do in cases wherein an invitee can’t attend — she knows when the shower will be and can send a gift if she so chooses.

    MissPinkKate: You could send a virtual gift 😉

    KES: That is sweet, considering that people must have worked together to put it together ahead of time, much like a card that everyone signs and then sends to a far-off recipient. It doesn’t sound anything like a “gift grab” and probably made those who couldn’t attend a shower feel like they were still participating in the process. I very much like the idea of a box of well-wishes.