There are a lot of guides out on the web, on television, in books, etc. on how to avoid wedding disasters. Goodness knows the subject has come up once or seventeen times here!
But one thing I have noticed is that a lot of these guides aren’t really talking about serious disasters. They’re talking about minor to middling snafus that truly can be planned for and dealt with. And even then, some of them are full of questionable advice.
Really? Most weddings have so many potential crashers that a doorman is necessary? No woman can do her own make up without looking like a clown? Speaking as a bride who did her own makeup and looked almost as though she wasn’t wearing any, but without getting washed out in the photographs taken in natural light on a sunny, California afternoon, I really don’t believe a professional makeup artist was something I needed to spend the money on. All your guests are such lushes that you have to issue a very limited number of drink tickets to keep them all from getting plastered and causing mayhem? Okay, that might be the case in some circles, but I honestly doubt that it’s a universal situation.
And pretty much the only thing on that list I can imagine turning into a true wedding disaster is if one of those drunken sots you invited managed to overpower the bartender, drink himself nearly blind, and go out and get behind the wheel of a car… or fall over your cake barrier into dessert.
So things run a little late, or someone gets a spot on her dress, or a guest needs to have their car keys taken away until they can sleep it off. So what? These are not disasters. So you have to find random fill-ins at the last minute because the best man forgot the rings. So what? Chances are someone in the audience has reasonable rings you can use for that moment… or you can even forego the ring part of the ceremony, since it’s actually an optional thing in legal terms. Find them and put them on later. Even missing bouquets or ill-fitting tuxes – while certainly not happy things – aren’t true disasters. And in some cultures, it’s considered good luck if there’s rain on your wedding day. As long as you have a back up plan for your outdoor wedding, that’s not a disaster, either.
Let’s put this into perspective. Take a look at this article about real wedding disasters. If nobody at your wedding gets: nearly killed by a runaway horse and carriage, assaulted, severe food poisoning, or arrested… chances are your wedding wasn’t a true disaster.
So relax. Plan for what you can plan for, and leave the rest up to fate. Take what comes with the best humor you can, and realize it could pretty much always get worse.