A while back, the magnificent Megan had this to say:
You know what I would love to see? A post about and with lots of photos/poses where the bride is taller than the groom. That’s sort of a “common but unusual” thing and I think many people aren’t sure how to handle it. Do brides still wear heels? Are photo poses different? Do they embrace it? And so on.
Easy-peasy, I thought, there are probably hundreds of photos of taller brides posed with shorter groom out there since tall ladies do marry compact gents. But, no. I thought wrongly. The problem is not that there aren’t brides who are taller than their grooms, but rather that so many couples and/or wedding photographers go to great pains to hide what everyone can clearly see.
So instead of hundreds of photos, I found one great photo, some really crap photos, and then hundreds of blog posts and forum discussions all about how to hide the fact that the groom is shorter than the bride. Here are some highlights:
- Shoot at ridiculous angles so you can’t tell how tall anyone actually is
- Find a hill and have the groom stand higher on the angle than the bride
- Outfit the bride in flats, and put the groom in lifts
- Have the bride stands in a depression in the ground
- Or have the groom stands on a box
- If the couple is sitting, they may be the same height
- Be sure the bride is hunching over or bend her knees in posed shots
- And maybe also kick off her shoes
- Pose them on a staircase with the groom on a higher tread
There was also a lot of “ask him if it will make him uncomfortable to look up at you” and “check with the groom to make sure he doesn’t mind the thought of your wearing heels,” as if the ‘shorter groom’ wasn’t once the ‘shorter boyfriend’ and won’t forevermore be the ‘shorter husband,’ even if the bride hates heels.
And really? No one worries about “looking mismatched” when it’s the groom who is taller than the bride! Sometimes couples and their wedding photographers will even have a bit of fun with it. Let’s say the photog takes all sorts of posed shots that make the groom look taller than the bride – I can just imagine their future kiddies asking their daddy why he was so much taller than mommy when he was younger.
So to answer Megan’s question, there are lots of ways to make shorter grooms look taller than their taller brides, mostly involving angles, hills, staircases, sitting down, and taking off one’s shoes. Unfortunately, what this leads to is a lack of great photos that show shorter grooms and taller brides looking happy and natural. Plus, it means that there are lots of photos of shorter grooms and taller brides that look like photos of taller grooms and shorter brides, which just end up looking like everyone else’s wedding photographs.
And to that I say “Bah!” I can understand not wanting to accentuate the difference – in any couple where one person is a lot taller than the other – but to actively try to hide it? I’d much rather see a pair of people who are comfortable with who they are and in love and enjoying their wedding day without worrying about who is taller than whom, in which case you get a photo like this:
All right, I know they look like something straight out of a magazine shoot, but that there is a real live couple in their wedding finery, as featured on Short Shrifted via Loveship. They look great, no? And they look great together, yes? And oh em gee her dress! And that bow tie! *swoon*
The only other great shorter groom/taller bride wedding photo (other than this one) I could find came from wedding photographer Chris Ling, who caught a kiss from far off and says “The first reaction I got from this photograph to the few people I have shown it to is, ‘Why is the bride taller than the groom?’ and my question to them is, ‘Why not?'”
Indeed. Why shouldn’t a bride be taller than the groom? Like I said, plenty of groom’s are ridiculously taller than their brides and no one seems to kick up a fuss over that. It may not be the most common bride-groom configuration, but there are tall guys and short guys and tall gals and short gals. No one should have to hunch over during their reception or stand on a box during the ceremony or wear flats when they live in heels just because someone somewhere thinks XYs must always be taller than XXs.